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Sunday, 1 January 2012

Following the Mozziah Day 109 Sunday 1st January 2012

My karaoke performance last night reminded me of The Mozziah, I couldn't be bothered and cancelled at the last minute! That's a bit unfair really, on The Mozziah I mean, not on my potential audience who looked nonplussed by the whole thing, you see The Mozziah has never cancelled on me, well not last minute anyway. The only time I had bought a ticket to see him and he didn't play, was at the Isle of Wight Festival in 2005, but as I was going anyway, it was not the end of the world.

In fact, I'd had mixed feelings about seeing The Mozziah at a festival because I like to be surrounded by disciples when I watch him perform, there is something very bonding about standing in the 'Moz Pit', singing every word to every song with your arms wrapped around complete strangers. I have always watched from the Moz Pit, I couldn't possibly sit in a seat and gently applaud, it's all about getting lost in the moment, singing at the top of your voice, pushing and shoving everybody in sight and going home soaked in sweat, a horrible, cold, clingy sweat, beautiful. I remember the time I attended the Meltdown Festival at The Royal Festival Hall in 2004, hold on a sec, did I remember to put that in my Top 10 yesterday? *goes off to check* It would appear I didn't, anyway, when I went to see The Mozziah at The Festival Hall, I was mortified to see an all seater venue with absolutely no room to stand. I imagined that the concert would be a bit boring, with no atmosphere, but luckily I, and a couple of dozen others, stood in front of the stage and refused to move when asked to by the usherettes, it resulted in a fantastic concert with the smallest Moz Pit I am probably ever likely to witness and for the record, the highlight song was 'Let Me Kiss You'.

So, 2012 has arrived. I've never been a big one for finding anything symbolic about a new year and am pleased to say I've never felt the need to send a text message to everybody in my phone wishing them a Happy New Year, why do people do that? Who knows what 2012 will bring but I do wonder where I am going with this blog, am I now destined to write about The Mozziah forever or will it peter out? (NB. I have just googled the word 'peter' because I couldn't believe it could really be spelt the same as the name 'Peter' and the definition says' Verb: Decrease or fade gradually before coming to an end'. Nothing wrong with that, but it also says 'Noun: A man's penis'. What's that all about?) I shall carry on with the blog while I have something to say and while people still read it. I am hoping that MorrisseysWorld will reappear in full with regular updates and then I can report on it. Having said that, this blog actually takes up a lot of my time and I am supposed to be starting out on a new career as a writer soon, so if I'm spending lots of time in Twitterdilly and writing this blog, how am I ever going to write anything? I'll have to let fate guide me. I also have an honest belief that the Mozziah will one day be acknowleged as the most important person/artist/poet/songwriter to have lived in this part of history, so perhaps I am documenting this chapter of his life for historical purposes?

Mind you, surely Simon Goddard's 'Mozipedia' does that job better than most. It is a book that has been around for a couple of years but I have only just been given it (Christmas present) and it is showing me that I know very little of The Mozziah and his life. Some disciples know everything about The Mozziah, have read everything he has ever said he's read, have watched all the films he's said he's watched and have listened to all the music he says has influenced him. I'm just not like that and have no desire to be, the only two things that really, really interest me about The Mozziah are his songs and his mind. I would never want to be a clone and am not a completist (somebody who owns every record, cd, cassestte etc ever released). The Mozziah would probably be horrified to know that I have never listened to a Nico song in my life and until this morning, when I happened to read about her in Mozipedia, I had no idea she was German and is buried in Berlin. While The Mozziah listened to Nico in his bedroom, I listened to Blockbuster by Sweet, which leads me on to something which is going to happen in 2012 which fills me with a little sadness, my collection of every UK Number 1 single will be coming to an end. Let me explain, if you are remotely interested:

I was brought up on the charts, initially the Top 30 and then the Top 40. I would listen to the chart run down religiously at school on a Tuesday lunchtime on my small radio and record it on a Sunday. I would spend all my pocket money buying chart records, they were my whole world. Blockbuster by Sweet was the first record I ever bought, a number 1 thirty nine years ago from January 1973, Christ, I had just turned seven, I can't imagine a seven year old in this day and age going out to buy their favourite song, well of course they wouldn't, there is nothing to 'go out' and buy, and there in lies my Number 1's problem. In 1998, for some reason, I decided to try and collect every UK number 1 single ever. The chart started in November 1952, so although I had many number ones from the seventies and eighties, I had very few from the nineties and hardly any from the fifties and sixties. Obsession took over and I completed the whole collection within a year, and I have continued to buy the number one single every week. The humiliation of having to go in to HMV every week to buy Westlife CD singles is something I'd rather not dwell on, but at least it was something real to hold, where as nowadays, with downloads, there is nothing 'physical' anymore about pop music, there is no paper label, no vinyl and now not even a plastic cd cover.

Pop music isn't real anymore in more ways than one. Since the demise of the cd single, my number 1's collection has managed to limp on thanks to the promo copies of new releases that are sent to Radio stations. One of my friends, who is in charge of the airplay for a local radio station, (and no, he has no taste & won't play The Mozziah) keeps the number ones for me and luckily some artists/record companies, still produce cd singles, and very rarely, some even still release on vinyl, but in 2011, things started to change and many of the artists/record companies not only stopped releasing on vinyl, they also stopped releasing on cd, and have stopped sending hard copy promos, they are merely emailing the promo. My collection is a physical one, downloads can't be held and caressed and I am just waiting for the first 'non existent' number 1 to appear, or not appear as the case may be, and end my collection forever!

 'Someone Like You' by Adele looked liked being the first number one to have no physical presence (does that mean it doesn't really exist? That would be nice!) but my *adopts Inbetweeners voice, which incidentally is by far the funniest thing on tv these days*  'Radio Friend' managed to get the record company to produce me a special promo copy. It has also been released on cd abroad, so I will be able  to buy it as an import. In August however, my *adopts inbetweeners voice again, sorry, I can't help it* 'Radio Friend' was unable to get a promo copy of  'Promises' by Nero, but bizarrely, a 12 inch vinyl version was released despite there being no cd. It is now just a matter of time though. Pop music died many years ago, but the final nails will be driven in during 2012. I am currently debating whether to write a book entitled '60 Years of UK Number 1 Singles'. I'm not too sure if enough people will be interested though, certainly not the record companies who have allowed pop music to die and it won't be long before all interest in a chart goes too.

  So where is The Mozziah? Despite the odd tweet from both '@MorrisseysWorld' and '@Morrisseysmum', he has pretty much gone to ground. The 'Parody Tour Journals' have still not been published on, and I am guessing they won't be published until the poll ends. What poll I hear you cry? I forgot to mention, that a few days ago, a poll was published on MorrisseysWorld asking, 'Who Is Behind MorrisseysWorld?' The choices are; Morrissey, Mike Joyce, Guardian hack/journo or Tseng, Broken, Russell Brand, Ratsback, JK Rowling, Freeyourself or other Superfan. I am disappointed to report that 'Morrissey' is leading the votes with 68%, while I and my fellow super fans have 21%. I have no idea how much of the 21% I account for but I am of course flattered to even be in the poll. I have no idea who freeyourself is, I'm guessing a SO-Lowist, do I really count as a 'Superfan' when I know so little of The Mozziah and his life? Does anyone know anything of the REAL Mozziah and his life? For all we know, while we all sit here patiently waiting for those bloody Tour Journals, The Mozziah could be holed up in his bedroom, pretending to be the spirit of Nico and visiting The Tacheles in Berlin, well anything is possible!

Rustle is back in Twitterdilly, but this time not sporting his 'buck teeth'. I have decided not to reveal his identity this time so that when all this goes viral, and believe me, its only a matter of days away now, (Tour Journals will set it off) he can remain anonymous and part of 'our gang'. I no longer know what the role of my blog is, should I not be reporting which Twitterdilly 'character' I believe him to be? This blog started out as just a way of venting all my thoughts about the whole MW story but now there are certain things I'm not reporting. I need to give this more thought, but for now, it is 2.30pm and I haven't listened to a single Mozziah song yet this year, so best I do. Which one shall I chose? *Pulls up Youtube* 'There is Something I wanted to tell you, it's so funny, you'll kill yourself laughing'. That'll do.

1 comment:

  1. I am one of the 21%, there are only 14 of us out there as of this writing.(It's not that I'm a wiz at #'s that's the number written faintly in the blue graph bar by the poll if you look closely. The Morrissey guess has 45) May I add that this is day 7 of my following the "Following the Mozziah" blog and I'm enjoying it.


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