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Tuesday, 3 January 2012

Following the Mozziah Day 111 Tuesday 3rd January 2012

I have changed the mental picture in my head of  both Twitter & Twitterdilly.  I now see the whole of Twitter as this vast Narnia type waste land that is detached from the real/physical world. It covers all nations and you are able to wander freely around it, spotting celebrities, friends and of course many, many strangers. Within this vast land are various different areas where people gather. As soon as I've entered the vast land of Twitter, I head to a cosy little Morrissey theme pub called The Twitterdilly Arms, and the talk within it, is mainly Morrissey related, or as I like to call him, The Mozziah, for he is indeed, God. The Twitterdilly Arms is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week and 365 days a year (366 this year). There is nearly always somebody in the Twitterdilly Arms and usually the juke box will be playing a tune, more often than not, a song by The Mozziah as the regulars post their Youtube experiences. A warm inglenook  fire burns in the pub and hanging on the wall is a huge timeline. Most regulars will enter the Twitterdilly Arms and the first thing they will do is check the timeline. The timeline shows you exactly who has been in the pub and what conversations they have had. The regulars can even leave messages for each other on the timeline. Once the timeline has been checked, it is time to search out a friend to talk to. Sometimes you may just chat with one person, or there may be a couple of you at the bar. At other times a whole group may be involved in a larger conversation and if you miss something that is said, you can pop over to the wall and scroll the timeline. When The Mozziah pops into The Twitterdilly Arms, the atmosphere changes and the whole group gather around him to listen to his wit. Sometimes The Mozziah will lead the whole group out onto the raised patio outside, where he will shout and cajole at passers by in the vast outside world. Perhaps it will be Justin Bieber walking past or Jordan and The Mozziah will let them have it with both barrels. They very rarely answer back, and anyway, they'd be no match for his untamed wit. Boy George often strolls past The Twitterdilly Arms but he never comes in, very few do, perhaps they can't even see the entrance door. George will shout up to The Mozziah, always giving as good as he gets and always leaving with a smile on his face. Rustle Brand is a regular of The Twitterdilly Arms but he's usually in disguise. I suppose if everybody knew Rustle was a regular, the pub would be swarmed, so it's probably just as well he keeps on his false beard and dark glasses. Laying around on the table of The Twitterdilly Arms are numerous copies of my blog. The regulars will often pick it up and have a browse through, just to catch up on the happenings of the day and to see what my muddled mind is full of. There are also stacks of copies of MorrisseysWorld, a bright and glossy magazine (as opposed to my bland looking pamphlet that you'd expect from the local Parish Church) that is filled with stories and pictures and absolute gobbledy gook ( Log Lady). The MorrisseysWorld magazines are also freely available outside of The Twitterdilly Arms and many people within the Narnia land of Twitter read it, some think it is an amusing little publication but nothing to do with the real Mozziah and others read it and think it really could be the real Mozziah but aren't quite sure. They see the Twitterdilly Arms sat there, with smoke gently wafting from the chimney pot, but they do not venture inside. The regulars often wander outside and shout to passers by that The Mozziah is inside, some people will pop their heads in, listen to The Mozziah talk and usually then leave, some spouting insults in his direction as they head for the door, but The Mozziah always has the last word and the insulters are ALWAYS outwitted. There is a door at the very back of The Twitterdilly Arms that leads into a private chat room that is actually called MorrisseysWorld, there is a big red neon MW sign above the door. The room is completely empty, with the exception of a small goldfish bowl, with half a dozen fish in it. The Mozziah himself will sometimes enter this room and chat candidly to some of the regulars. There is only space for ten people in this room, so if you see The Mozziah go in there, you have to follow quickly or otherwise you are left listening at the door. This room is currently locked up and unused, it hasn't been open since November. The MorrisseyWorld magazine is sometimes taken out of circulation too, particularly if The Mozziah is off spreading his gospel, (that's concerts to you & I) but when a new edition comes out, the regulars are glued to it's pages. A new edition is due out any day, in which the Tour Journals of the recent US & Mexican tour will be published. The regulars will quietly sit in the pub, lapping up every last drop of information, and will then all feverishly discuss the contents. My blog will then reproduce the highlights of the journals and report on other goings on from within The Twitterdilly Arms. The Twitterdilly Arms is a lovely little country pub and despite many people knowing of it's existence, very few come in, I wonder if that will change?
  And now it's time for me to do what I'm here to do, update on The Mozziah. The tour journals, as I've just mentioned, have still not yet been published and The Mozziah has tweeted to say he is, "On the verge of giving up on my tour journal. Would anyone miss it?" I think it's fair to say, if he does give up on those long awaited journals, he will be strung up from the Twitterdilly Arms sign and left to dangle. He is just teasing of course, they will no doubt be published soon, in fact the MW Blogsite has promised within the next 5-25 hours and that was about eighteen hours ago, so they could be imminent, or not as the case may be! The Mozziah's first tweet of yesterday was to retweet my blog, which he has done a number of times now, I really am very honoured. He then tweeted to say, "Followingthemozziah is the only news blog worth reading. In order to be closer to it, I now have a home in Gt. Yarmouth." He has even changed his location bio to read, 'London, Rome, LA, Gt Yarmouth'. Again, a deep honour, although if he has now moved to Gt Yarmouth, he has in fact moved further away from the blog, as I live firmly in the other direction and have only ever been to Gt Yarmouth once in my life, in search of some leg action, which I found, but was then man handled! (You'll have to trawl back to my very early blog days to find the whole story). From a personal view point, The Mozziah's new 'virtual' house in Gt Yarmouth is very pleasing, and far better than Pontefract! Whilst on the subject of Twitter bio's, Rustle Brand has completely ignored my 'Please please please' request of yesterday to change his '@RustyRockets' account to mirror Miley Cyrus's. I feel this is a shame as the press would have been utterly confused by it all, but hey, it's his 3.8 million follower account and not mine, it may be bland, but let him do with it what he likes. Talking of followers, '@MorrisseysWorld' now has an impressive 4,280 followers, while my account has fallen from 1,800 when I first started following him, to 1,400 now! The only new follower I have gained in recent weeks is some cycling related company after I tweeted '@JodyRoad' to mention his/her buggered bike. (He/she has a buckled bike wheel as his/her twit pic). You have to be very careful what you tweet these days, or the corporates will 'ave yer. Back to MW, he tweeted the names of all the 'MorrisseyWorlders' who he follows and who have been here (there? In The Twitterdilly Arms?) since the beginning. He didn't mention '@Banjaxer' but Banj tweeted, "Don't forget me. I've been watching you pretending to be him for ages. Not sure why now I think about it." MW simply retweeted Banj's tweet so I am none the wiser. Is Banj just an old 'Manc Hack' watching the whole story from the outside, still keeping half an eye on it, just in case it's true, or is he firmly involved? The Mozziah also tweeted the mysterious '@comradeharps' who I have mentioned before, he was the guy with the permanent blog link to MW, all the time it was shut. Is he a librarian from Australia as he claims? Or is he too involved in MW? The Mozziah also sent a collective tweet to '@johnny_marr, @AndyRourke64 and @mikejoycedrums' saying, "Reforming might be on the cards. Still no solo record deal. Anyone know a decent drum machine?" I would guess he got no replies, particularly from JM, who has blocked both MW & me, relating to an unsavoury incident a few months ago when we made honest comment on his singing voice. In fact, as I recall, we weren't really that nasty about it & The Mozziah even called him a great guitarist, which he is. Some people are so touchy. Joyce is definitely keeping an eye on the whole MW story. He only follows 27 people, but i am one of them, I think I am his peep hole, which is fine, as he is my naked lawn mower, cutting grass with his teeth. I have no idea if he still reads my blog (he once left a lengthy comment on it), but if he does, I hope he's enjoying it. Ready to say sorry yet Mike? You know he'll reform without you if he doesn't get a record deal soon don't you? *Sees a nose being cut off an old Manc drummer's face, in spite* Oh well, keep spinning those discs.


  1. The Twitterdilly Arms:
    Playlist - 02 January 2012

    Morrissey: Lost
    The Smiths: Work Is A Four Letter Word
    The Smiths: Stretch Out And Wait
    Radiohead: Creep Acoustic Flash
    Morrissey: Now My Heart Is Full
    Fred and Ginger: Let’s Face The Music And Dance
    Allo Darlin': Henry Rollins Don't Dance
    Paddington Bear: Singing In The Rain
    The Smiths: Stretch Out And Wait
    Starland Vocal Band: Afternoon Delight (1976)
    The Smiths: Well I Wonder
    The Smiths: Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before
    Morrissey: I’ve Changed My Plea To Guilty
    The Smiths: Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me
    Talking Heads: Psycho Killer
    The Smiths: Well I Wonder
    Doris Day: Que Sera Sera
    Morrissey: Speedway
    Elvis Presley: Wooden Heart
    Josef Strauss: Delirien Walz
    The Carpenters: Rainy Days and Mondays
    Radiohead: Creep Acoustic Flash
    The Smiths: Asleep
    The The: This Is The Day

  2. The Twitterdilly Arms:
    Playlist - 03 January 2012

    Morrissey: The More You Ignore Me
    Morrissey: 18 Our Frank (Hammersmith 91)
    The Smiths: Shelia Take A Bow (Porter Version Jan. ‘87)
    Gilbert O’Sullivan: Nothing Rhymed (1971)
    Ecce Bombo: Vengo, non vengo
    Coldplay: Paradise
    Gilbert O’Sullivan: Alone Again (Original Version)
    Morrissey: {Janice Long} Redondo Beach
    All About Eve: Martha’s Harbour
    Morrissey: Action Is My Middle Name
    Dickie Valentine: Finger Of Suspicion
    Pilot: January
    The Death Of Kenneth Williams
    Howler: I Told You Once
    George Michael: Faith
    Elvis: (Marie’s The Name) His Latest Flame
    The Andrew Sister: Show Me The Way To Go Home
    The Smiths: His Latest Flame/ Rusholme Ruffians (Rank)
    Adam & The Ants: Prince Charming
    The Smiths: Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now
    Eurovision 1980 - Johnny Logan: What’s Another Year
    Eurovision 1979 - Gali Atari & Milk and Honey: Hallelujah
    Teach In: Ding A Dong
    John Denver: Leaving On A Jet Plane
    The Smiths: Half A Person
    Morrissey: I Know It’s Gonna Happen Someday (Live in Manchester - 2005)
    Teach In: Ding A Dong
    Leo Sayer: The Show Must Go On
    Morecambe & Wise: Bring Me Sunshine
    Standard Fare: Philadelphia
    Standard Fare: 05 11 07
    The The: Uncertain Smile
    Morrissey: I Like You
    Jeff Buckley: Hallelujah
    The Pogues: A Pair Of Brown Eyes
    Spandau Ballet: To Cut A Long Story Short
    The Smiths: Well I Wonder
    Amy Winehouse & Tony Bennett: Body And Soul
    Boytronic: Out Of The Darkness
    Erasure: Little Respect
    Ray Charles: Come Back
    Morrissey: Trouble Loves Me
    Elvis: A Little Less Conversation
    Morrissey: I’ve Changed My Plea To Guilty
    The Smiths: Asleep
    Morrissey: Lifeguard Sleeping, Girl Drowning
    The Smiths: Miserable Lie
    Shocking Blue: Sleepless At Midnight
    All About Eve: Martha’s Harbour
    Suede: Sleeping Pills


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