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Wednesday, 4 January 2012

Following the Mozziah Day 112 Wednesday 4th January 2012

Today my blog has received it's 10,000th hit, and finally I am able to work out why I started writing it & why God decided to put me on his great, green earth......to build a virtual pub called The Twitterdilly Arms. Yep, some people have their three score and ten and achieve nothing, some have far less than that and achieve greatness, I've had forty six & eleven days and created a non existent pub! Not just any old virtual, non existent pub, oh no, mine's a Morrissey theme pub, full of non existent Morrissey fans and it is occasionally frequented by a non existent, possibly parody, Morrissey. "And they say he was mental."  Mother, I can feel the soil etc etc. Anyway, I may as well try and make the most of it. To say my explanation (about Twitterdilly seeming like a pub) has gone down well with the natives, is an understatement, all the regular MorrisseyWorlders on twitter have taken to my idea like a nightingale to a thorn, and the Twitterdilly Arms is up and rocking. The locals have even designed a logo and have delegated/designated/dedicated bar staff; 'stillicling', 'girlwithout', 'mmedestaelghost'(although she doesn't know it yet) and 'JodyRoad'. 'Stillicling' has also taken on the role of noting every song that is played on the pub juke box and will be listing it at the end of each of my blogs in the comment section. If you care to take a look at the comments section under my blog of yesterday, you will see the list for the last two days. As you would expect to find in a Mozziah theme pub, there is plenty of The Smiths & Morrissey, but my personal favourite of yesterday was 'Ding A Dong' by In Teach, what a beauty, I immediately went to itunes and bought it, as it was one of the songs I had lost a year ago when my itunes library crashed and disappeared. That has happened to me twice now, it is soul destroying. When it happens, the first thing you do is, go through your cd collection and burn everything back into your library, but songs like 'Ding A Dong', that you don't have on cd, are forgotten until suddenly you are reminded of them. The same thing happened with Gilbert O'Sullivan's 'Nothing Rhymed', which I am pleased to say is now back in it's rightful place on my ipod, nestling into X-Ray Spex's 'Indentity' and three doors down from 'What Do I Get?' by The Buzzcocks. Anyway, back to The Twitterdilly Arms where the music plays loud and the bar staff work hard. I have had to add individual pigeon holes on one of the walls, so that all the regulars can pick up their private messages. There is now a ritual for most when entering the fantasy internet land; 1)Visit MorrisseysWorld to see if there are any updates, 2)Enter the Twitterdilly Arms, 3)Check personal pigeon hole for messages, 4)Go to the timeline on the wall and scroll to the bottom, the place where you left the Twit Arms on your last visit, 5) Slowly scroll up the timeline, replying to comments along the way 6)Reach the top & start tweeting. The scrolling thing can take quite a while, depending on how long you've been away. Because of the length of the timeline & the scroll, I have decided to be ruthless and start unfollowing people who block my scroll. The main offenders are the ones who either aren't drinkers in the Twitterdilly Arms and those who keep retweeting things that say nothing to me about my life, they are an irritant. I must've followed and unfollowed Boy George about a hundred times. I like it when he is involved with The Mozziah but all other times I'm afraid he bores me, not literally, as I've said before, I'm a virgin in that department and the last person you want sniffing around your untainted back door is former boxer George 'Boy' O'Dowd, blimey! I wonder if he's related to Dave 'Boy' Green? Why do I type any old nonsense that comes into my head? Where was I? Camden? No, I'll come back to Camden another time. Ah yes, followers. As I was saying, I have 'unfollowed' Boy 'Green' George and have also unfollowed people like '@Lordcarla'. I am finding that I am only interested in the regulars of the Twitterdilly Arms and when I am scrolling up my timeline I get annoyed when Richard Dawkins suddenly jumps out at me. Even Preston from The Ordinary Boys has been dumped but his portrait remains on my study wall. '@JaniceWhaley' and '@Mikejoycedrums' have both been given a stay of execution but I am shocked that Joyce has remained loyal to me after all the flack I've given him. Johnny 'I Know You & You Cannot Sing' Marr banned me after one little nibble but I've taken chunks out of Joyce, AND I've even got him cutting my lawn, probably naked, and he STILL doesn't block me! He's one thick skinned drummer. Hold up, he isn't a drummer anymore, he just plays his record player. He needs to change his twit name to '@MikeJoycedecks' or '@MikeJoyceRecordplayer', or even '@MikeJoyceLawnMowerReplaceableParts', and The Mozziah needs to rewrite 'It's Not Your Birthday Anymore' and call it, 'Your Not My Drummer' anymore. He could even do a 'mash up' with 'Im OK By Myself' to include the lyrics, "And you never were, you never were". Am I blocked yet? No? How about a reworking of The Miracles song 'Love Machine' with the lyrics, "I'm just a drum machine and I won't work for nobody but you". *Stands back, watches The Mozziah, Brand & the rest of his loyal readers wet themselves laughing, pats himself on the back for such blisteringly quick, untamed wit, and carries on*. So, back to the Twitterdilly Arms again, it really is the online Rovers Return and yesterday was frequented by;  GirlOnBike1102, Stillicling, RosyMires, mancladmozfan, JodyRoad, loughtonlil, girlwithout, heathercat222, aboyinthebush22, Hector_Lector, Its_Only_Me_K, EcubyanMusings (afka EcubyanTeaChest), Lizzycat4 and AIRRAID25. My timeline also showed babydub77 and amor_y_locura, who are both believers of MW, but neither have embraced, or know about the pub, so I presume they were just passing by. When everybody had left The Twitterdilly Arms, which is a very rare occurrence, (as there are people visiting from all over the world in different time zones) who should pop in to the empty pub? The Mozziah, dressed as mum. He watches us, I know he just sits there watching us, as we talk about him, play his songs and idle our lives away, waiting, waiting, waiting, for either news of concerts, albums or FUCKING TOUR JOURNALS, parody ones at that, where are they? On their way you say? The spelks fault you say? Oh and you've been distracted because I mentioned Boz's Pink Panther boxer shorts? Okay, sorry for shouting. *Blows a kiss to the poorly finger*  3am The Mozziah popped into the pub, 3am! and he wondered why there was nobody there?! '@MorrissysWorld' made no appearance yesterday but proved he was lurking near the Twit Arms by retweeting @GirlonBike1102's tweet/quote from the ITV telly programme 'Endeavor', which read, "@MorrisseysWorld The first time I heard your voice, I realised that there is real beauty in the world."  MW obviously liked that tweet, and I must say, the tv programme was good too, although for legal reasons, I should point out that the voice in question was not that of The Mozziah, but a fictitious opera singer who *SPOILER ALERT* ended up being the murderer. I hope The Mozziah doesn't end up killing anyone, he's got previous you know, he's killed at least a dog and a horse to my knowledge. He is especially vulnerable to killings if heading North! I am pleased to announce that '@sarahlmilburn', or 'Wor Sarah' as I like to call her, has tweeted, "@TheRatsBack your blog is in a league of its own, fanbloodytastic!" This girl obviously has taste but currently no MW followers, so could regular readers of this blog please follow her and invite her for a drink in the Twitterdilly Arms?
  Finally for today, my number 1's collection now has Coldplay's 'Paradise' added to it. As usual, neither the artiste nor Parlophone has given any thought toward us record/cd/anything physical collectors, and have released the song purely on download. Luckily, I have once again managed to get a promo cd, thus keeping my collection going, but my warning from the other day, that the UK charts are becoming more meaningless than ever, is accentuated by the fact that despite 'Paradise' (not named after the camping site in Carry On Camping by the way, which 'may' have made the song slightly more palatable) selling 118,547 copies between Sept 12th & Oct 24th, these sales weren't allowed to count and the song wasn't allowed to enter the chart, all because the song was made immediately available as part of a new album pre-order. It has to be said, it was excellent marketing by Coldplay and ridiculous that the sales weren't counted for chart purposes. The charts is dead boys. Records is dead boys. Even cds is dead boys. The dog is dead. The horse is dead. Confused? Head South!

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  2. The Twitterdilly Arms:
    Playlist - 04 January 2012

    Manic Street Preachers: This Is The Day (cover)
    Biff Bang Pow!: Sleep (Weather Prophets cover)
    Eurovision 1975 - Teach-In: Ding-A-Dong
    The Smiths: Wonderful Woman
    Morrissey: Everyday Is Like Sunday
    Morrissey: I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday (Meltdown, 2004)
    Morrissey: Life's A Pigsty
    Eurovision 1970 (Ireland) - Dana: All Kinds Of Everything
    The Smiths: The Headmaster Ritual (Live Spanish TV Special, 1985)
    Morrissey: Michaels Bones
    The Smiths: Half A Person
    Lulu: To Sir With Love
    Little Richard: Tutti Frutti
    Nancy Sinatra: These Boots Are Made For Walking (1966)
    Elvis Costello: Alison
    Sex Pistols: Anarchy In The UK (Broadcast Debut)
    Nancy Sinatra: Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)
    Splodgenessabounds: Two Pints Of Lager & A Packet Of Crisps Please
    The Buzzcocks: What Do I Get?
    Frank Sinatra: The Very Thought Of You
    John Cooper Clarke: Daily Express
    Nirvana: Smells Like Teen Spirit
    Morrissey: That's Entertainment (Cover)
    Nico: All Tomorrows Parties
    Nico: I'm Not Sayin' (1965)
    Sacha Distel: La Belle Vie (1968)
    Madness: Bed And Breakfast Man
    The Housemartins: Happy Hour
    Gilbert O' Sullivan: Nothing Rhymed (1971)
    Morrissey: Hairdresser on Fire (Live, 2004)
    Morrissey: Do Your Best And Don't Worry
    Marvin Gaye: Sexual Healing
    Morrissey: Such A Little Thing Makes Such a Big Difference
    The Smith: Is It Really So Strange (Rank Album, Live Footage)
    The Miracles: Love Machine/Do It Baby
    The Smiths: Reel Around The Fountain (Derby, ‘83)
    The Smiths: Stretch Out And Wait (Irvine, 1985)
    The Smiths: Headmaster Ritual
    The Smiths: I Know It's Over (Wolverhampton, 1986)
    Morrissey: Teenage Dad On His Estate (Munich, 20.11.2009)
    The Smiths: William It Was Really Nothing (Top Of The Pops, 30th August 1984)
    Morrissey: I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday (Sheffield, 92)
    The Smiths: The Boy With The Thorn In His Side (Studio, TOTP)
    David Bowie: Starman
    Ewan MacColl: Dirty Old Town
    Morrissey: Art-Hounds (Brixton)
    Morrissey: I Am Two people
    Van Morrison & The Chieftains: Carrickfergus
    Van Morrison: These Are The Days
    Mamas & Papas: Dedicated To The One I Love

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