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Saturday, 11 February 2012

Following the Mozziah Day 150 Saturday 11th February 2012

I seem to have fallen into a routine over these past five months. Once I have carried out a few early morning tasks in the real world, I settle down with my lap top and go through the same daily ritual, which is:
1. Log on to Google news & search Morrissey & Russell Brand.
2. Log on to Youtube & search Morrissey under 'Upload date'.
3. Log on to MorrisseysWorld.blogspot.com.
4. Log on to Twitter.
5. Log on to FollowingtheMozziah.blogspot.com.

This routine allows me to then write a blog entry, although, if I intend to write a comedy/parody piece, I usually come straight to here to get my ideas down before I forget them. Most of my comedy ideas come to me in my sleep, or when walking the dog. This morning, as I walked old Bonzo, (that's not his real name, but I can't mention his real name without his permission, which thus far, he has refused to give) I had a whole parody script come flying into my head, featuring The Mozziah & Boz, and it was my intention to write it as today's blog entry, but I have decided to save it for tomorrow or Monday, or perhaps never, it all depends on events. I have a number of unfinished articles that for one reason or another, have never made it onto the blog. The main reason for not writing the Moz/Boz piece today, is because my readership level has fallen to an all time low of just 13. There is no point writing good comedy for so few people. It would appear that I have lost most of my audience, probably because they now have two years worth of MorrisseysWorld material to wade through. I was merely a substitute when MW disappeared, especially during the US & Mexican tour, when even The Mozziah referred to this blog as, "his umbilical cord". I think I shall adopt that as my next line of unemployment, an unemployed umbilical cord, I like it, and in many ways, this blog IS an umbilical cord. When a baby is inside the womb, the umbilical cord is everything, but once outside, in the big wide world, the cord becomes meaningless and obsolete, it is hacked off with a pair of old scissors and tossed into the bin, never to be seen, or thought of again. Umbilical cords, the world over, go the same way, and not even a, "thanks for all you've done in there" from either the mother or baby, nope, it's just a case of you were good in your time mate, now get off the stage.
   I think my readership level, of just thirteen people yesterday, may also be because I didn't post the blog on twitter. I reasoned that if anybody 'really' wanted to read it, they would come and find it, rather than me thrust it at them. At least I know, that the thirteen who came looking for it, will have actually read it, where as when I was getting a hundred + readers a day, the majority probably switched off after the first six lines, I know that's what I do with most things I read. Having said that, I have now finished 'My Bookety Wookety' and am already racing through Book 2 of Rustic Brind's life so far.
  As I mentioned at the start of today's blog, my daily routine is pretty much the same. I type the word 'Morrissey' in to google news to see if a) he's made it through the night (after all, I'd hate to find out from somebody else that he'd popped his clogs, especially if it was from somebody who wasn't even a fan, which incidentally, is the vast majority of people I know, in fact I can picture it now, a conversation with somebody about nothing in particular, and then, as a tag on to the conversation, they say, "You liked that Morrissey bloke didn't you? He died yesterday, miserable twat, he'll probably be happy now." No, when The Mozziah checks out, I need the information to come from google, and nobody else! ) b)(if you're still with me at this point) To see what he's been up to. It was by using google news, that I found out about the infamous 'haircut' incident on the US tour, in which Ron Villareal (was that his name? I can't remember & can't be bothered to look back and check!) tried to keep The Mozziah's hair. I am still hoping to read about this incident in the much anticipated 'Tour Diaries', which incidentally, could soon be published, as '@MorrisseysWorld' has now reached it's 5,000 follower mark. More about that in a minute, but firstly, I will carry on explaining my daily routine, after all, twitter is item four on the 'agenda' and we're still on item one, 'google'. Most of the time, the word 'Morrissey', in google news, just spills out a load of US politicians with the name Morrissey, and talking of US politicians, the news is full a man called Mitt Romney, who is being tipped to be the next US president. Well, this man is the spitting image of former Liverpool and England goalkeeper, Ray Clemence, a man who, despite being an outstanding goalkeeper for many years, is remembered for just one thing, letting a shot from Scotland's Kenny Dalglish trickle under him, thus sending England to a 2-1 defeat at the hands of the old enemy. I can still picture it now, as clear as day. What next for US politics, Peter Shilton and Joe Corrigan tossing their hats into the ring to take on Romney-Clemence for the White House?
  I never used to type Russell Brand into the google news thingy, but ever since The Mozziah introduced Russell to MW, back in October, as '@BucktoothedBoy', he seems to have become part to this whole story. Just what his involvement is, I still don't know, but if yesterday's 'JodyRoad' tweets are anything to go by, Brind & The Mozziah could be closer than anybody could ever have guessed, the tweets are certainly flirtatious to say the least! Brind & Mozziah an item? Surely not? Now, that 'would' be a story! My mind really is going into overload, but now I think about it, they'd make the perfect couple. Hmmm.
   The latest google news on Brind, is that he's not seeking any of his, soon to be ex-wife's, money, which is only right and proper. Also, it would appear that he was taken ill on stage last night. My concerns from the other day remain the same, and I can only hope he has people around him who can help, even if it's not The Mozziah. From what I've read about Brand so far, good friends may not be enough if he's decided to go in to self destruct mode, let's hope not.
  Item two on my agenda, Youtube, allows me to search for new gems and is particularly useful during The Mozziah's tours. Recently, it has been the discovery of all the Hollywood Bowl 2007 material that has created a buzz in the Twitterdilly Arms, with 'Last of the International Playboys' being the newest one to arrive on the scene.
  Item three on my daily agenda is MorrisseysWorld. Today reveals no new articles, and I still have about 70 old posts to read and comment on, I just cannot find the time! *STOP PRESS* I've just been back to MW, to make sure that nothing new has been added, and I find there is a new article welcoming a new admin guy, who apparently is called 'R' and has "appeared on national tv" and "is known for my hair". It is OBVIOUSLY Rita Fairclough, as I pointed out! The new admin guy has had the audacity to produce an 'Unofficial Twitterdilly Arms Top 10'. Bloody cheek!
   Item four is twitter. Well it had been fairly quiet recently, but a brief exchange between '@MW' & '@BoyGeorge' has sent '@MW' souring over 5,000 followers, to a current 5,110. There really is a feeling that things are being cranked up a notch. Even '@MorrisseysMum' has been tweeting again, and it looks like she may be back as 'Parody Mum', which would be superb. She tweeted that Noel Gallagher was coming around, then that the cat was still on medication from his brother's last visit. She finally sent a later tweet to '@NoelGallagher' saying, "Sorry we were out when you called. Pop round Monday evening if you're not busy."
   Happy days!

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