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Monday, 31 December 2012

Day 474 - Dear Our Mozzer.....

Our Mozzer has been fairly quiet over the past couple of days, probably because he has now stopped following all the ce(p)lebs on Twitter, and therefore has nowhere to fire his untamed wit. A new MW blog entry was posted late yesterday evening, which is a thought provoking piece entitled, 'Log Lady's History of Evil.' It is a very dark article and is a far cry from the comic content of the other day's Monopoly parody. The latest piece is written by Log lady, and tells of Soviet Gulags, freemasonary and EVIL. Log Lady also warns that the US government have built a Gulag. It is all fascinating and quite frightening stuff, and shows that MorrisseysWorld is very diverse.


Interestingly, 'R', the MW site administrator, has pointed out that Our Mozzer didn't write the article, it was written by the person behind Log Lady. Some people may interpret this to mean that MorrisseysWorld is a 'team' effort, although I would like to think it is one of Morrissey's many pessoa's, or rather, one of 'Steven's' many pessoas, as I see 'Morrissey' as a pessoa in his own right, ie, the professional singer who we all adore. I would like to hope that Log Lady is actually the work of Steven, as this makes him even more interesting than ever, although I may of course be completely barking up the wrong tree, and Log Lady really MIGHT be one of the 'team.'

'R' also states, "Just because someone is odd or different or mentally unwell, it does not invalidate their point of view - an important message of MorrisseysWorld." This statement reinforces the belief that I have had for many years, that Morrissey, sorry, 'Steven' suffers from some form of mental illness, although illness is actually the wrong word, it is far too harsh, I personally don't see it as an illness at all. It is pretty well known that Morrissey suffers from depression, but most people, like Morrissey, who are GENUINE geniuses, are quite often 'tortured geniuses', and the workings of a tortured genius are well beyond the understanding of a common or garden rat such as I, so I won't dare attempt to throw light on how Mozzer's mind works. All I know, is that I wouldn't want to change a single thing about him.

The subject of being 'mentally unwell' is probably best explained by Morrissey himself, in the song 'Something Is Squeezing My Skull.' Funnily enough, most of the answers to the questions about Morrissey can usually be found in his lyrics, after all, they can't ALL be written about a third party, some of them HAVE to be autobiographical.


Yesterday evening, I went out for a 'Curry Night' with members of my cricket club, and this morning at 3.30am, I woke up with a start, initially presuming that I was suffering from indigestion, but I quickly realised that it wasn't the indigestion that had awoken me, it was Our Mozzer!

My brain was throbbing with a whole set of interview questions for Our Mozzer, so I rushed downstairs to grab a pen and paper, so that I wouldn't forgot them in the morning. I wrote them all down and then went back to sleep.

I have interviewed Our Mozzer before (see Day 366 of this blog thing), but at the time, I was foolishly under the impression that I was interviewing Morrissey, so I didn't really have a grip on what I was doing. Subsequently, Our Mozzer tore me to pieces in the interview, and I was left to look a fool. I have also interviewed Morrissey (See here:, but the questions that came to me last night were PURELY for Our Mozzer. Forget asking John Robb to interview Our Mozzer, it has to be somebody who fully understands the whole MorrisseysWorld phenomenon, and that person is ME!

I dearly hope that Our Mozzer will see fit to respond to my questions, so fingers crossed for the FIRST EVER PROPER INTERVIEW WITH OUR MOZZER:

1. Hello Sir. You spent most of Christmas Day propping up the bar of the Twitterdilly Arms, guzzling gin. Is it fair to say that Christmas in the 'Our Mozzer' household, or to put it more accurately, the parody bedsit, was a little dull this year?

2. Many of the 'Deluded Dozen' have built a mental picture of your bedsit. My own personal image includes a faded NY Dolls poster and a framed Bobby Moore picture with a fake signature, probably purchased from ebay. Could you tell us a little more about your surroundings?

3. The other day in the Twitterdilly Arms, you put in an order for an 'XL' sized t-shirt for the true artiste HM Morrissey. Having seen Morr-ee-say's naked torso during his concerts, I would have thought him more of a size Large than an XL, so are you presuming he's added a few pounds over Christmas, and if so, do you think the next tour be the 'Keep It On' tour, or will TRM (The Real Morrissey) not give a fig about a little extra flesh on show, and still whip off the old shirt for the frinksters?

4. You have recently stopped following all the meaningless celebs on twitter, but we all enjoy seeing you lay into the likes of Piers Morgan and co. Can we expect to see a return to your celeb bashing in 2013?

5. Ricky Gervais is often a target for your acidic wit, and yet many of us presumed that TRM is a friend of Gervais, so why does 'Parody Moz' have such a go at him?

6. You are also very hard on Justin Bieber, but is he really any different to Elvis Presley, afer all, Presley wasn't a great lyricist, he was just a pretty face?

7. Oscar Wilde had his own secret society called 'Green Carnation.' You have now formed the Blue Rose Society for Morrissey in honour of Wilde. It is well known that in his youth, Morrissey liked fan clubs, and was involved with both The Cramps and New York Dolls. Do you think he will embrace the Blue Rose Society?

8. You've recently hinted that TRM may add 'Paint a Vulgar Picture' or 'Trouble Loves Me' into his set list, do you stand by this prediction?

9. You have stated on your blog that you think the freemasons may have stopped TRM getting a record deal, and yet both you AND Morrissey continue to use freemason signs, why?

10. You have recently mentioned that you have a song called 'Boredom is a Plague.' Are there any plans to secretly release this song onto the internet, thus creating a guessing game of Is it or Isn't it Morrissey? This, like MorrisseysWorld, would be a groundbreaking FIRST.

11. With Morrissey just about to embark on a seventy day tour, will you be closing your blog and twitter account again?

12. What is in store in 2013 for Our Mozzer?

13. Do you believe that TRM has anything meaningful left to say lyrically, or do you feel he is in danger of becoming a parody? If he DOES become a parody, would that make you a parody parody?

14. Finally, when you first appeared on twitter, we were all a little in awe of you, but in recent times you have mellowed considerably. Do you think TRM would approve of his parody being so unMorrisseyesque or are you actually being Morrisseyesque by presuming he wouldn't care less about some ridiculous parody thing on the interweb?

15. Actually, one last thing. A couple of days ago, a newbie called Naomi Ilsbroux discovered MorrisseysWorld, and subsequently my blog too. I set Naomi the challenge to read all of my blog and then let me know what she thought about the whole MorrisseysWorld phenomenon. I am saddened to see that instead of reading my blog, or indeed the whole of the MW blog, Naomi headed straight to Morrissey-Solo and asked the Solowers to let her know the truth about MW. Naomi was greeted by our old friend Uncle Skinny who informed her that, "It is some wanker and his mates who hatched a plan to make a film about internet gullibility, their subject Morrissey fans. That is the total sum of it." I fear that Naomi will accept what Skinny TELLS her, because So-Low is still seen to be the Morrissey gospel. What are your thoughts on this?

Thank you Our Mozzer.
With much love


  1. Kellie the drunk Crisp31 December 2012 at 15:00

    I'm confused and also drunk. So I might read this again laters. I didn't like the MW blog today and that probly makes me unpopular but it made me sad and confused. Well more unpopular sad and confused than usual. I'm going now. Happy New Year Rats and Mrs Whiskers and the little furry kids xxxxx

  2. I have my own ideas about who might hae been behind the blog post on mw but thats just my train of thought from what i've picked up from being an avid reader of mw. I have bipolar disorder mental illness is still concidered a taboo something to be ashamed of which is wrong. So many people with forms of mental disorders are my heroes and heroines Morrissey,Kurt Cobain,Ray Davies,Stephen Fry,Friedrich Nietzsche,Russell Brand, Virginia Woolf to name but a few.I'm proud of all those who go out and pave the way so it gets to be understood a bit better.
    I also hope that you get your questions answered as that will make a bloody great interview x

  3. Oh rat the tour is going to last a lot longer

  4. Great list of questions. I hope TRM grants you the interview.

    1. I DON'T want TRM, I want Our Mozzer. There IS a difference.

    2. Sorry 'bout that.

  5. I've said it before, but MW is such a gift. Although this latest piece may stir controversy and turn some away, I applaud the blog for encouraging us to question everything and to think for ourselves instead of blindly trusting what the media tells us. I hope that Our Mozzer sees fit to answer the interview questions - that would be most mesmerizing. Happy New Year to you all. x

  6. Very disturbing to see the same picture that "Morrissey" or "log lady" put on his blog... Unnecessary and disappointing

    1. Disappointing that I used the same picture, or 'disappointing' that the Soviets murdered these people? Life isn't all cotton candy.

  7. The truth may disturb, shock or amuse you. Yet - if the truth offends you, your life is a lie.


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