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Saturday, 30 March 2013

Day 563 - The Mozziah Returns.... and then Buggers off Again!

When I posted my blog entry of eight days ago, I really did believe that 'Our Mozzer' had gone forever, and that I had written my last entry regarding the whole MorrisseysWorld phenomenon, but as I packed my bags to head off on holiday, the mysterious 'Broken' left a message on my blog, and then the following day, Saturday 25th, Morrissey left a message on my blog too, asking me to interview him! Unfortunately, I just didn't have the time to put together an interview, but I tweeted to invite the Blue Rose Society to ask some questions, and off I set on my well deserved holiday.


Our Mozzer would like it known he will be doing one final interview for TRB's semi-mesmerizing Blog thing.

The conditions are as follows:

1 It must be published in full with no errors
2 Our Mozzer only answers interesting questions
3 thirty mesmerizing questions must be posed and some of these must be original and previously unasked
4 some of the questions must come from other BRS members
5 No questions must be asked about: (a) The Smiths or (b) the artiste's personal life



Later on that Saturday, Morrissey added the following to my blog:



Regardless of the questions posed, Our Mozzer has asked me to inform you he will be selecting a few questions of his own and he encourages you to leave them here, on the FollowingTheMozziah thing.

Our Mozzer chortled to himself at the following question:

"Climmy Worseapple23 March 2013 13:49
Sometimes, when I cry, I sit with a mirror before me and imagine that I am my own nonexistent disillusioned long-term partner, looking with scorn at my puffy, leaking face - immune to the rotting diseases of affection and empathy for "myself" thanks to a tough course of painful injections and some hard-earned antibodies. Can you recommend a song I can listen to while I do this?"

In between mouthfuls of red pepper and aubergine hummus, Our Mozzer stated: "Some of those c*nts wouldn't know a good question if it slapped them in the Barrett's oesophagus; on the other hand, Climmy Worseapple clearly does."

Our Mozzer took one bite out of his pink dessert apple before discarding it and rolling his eyes. Then he sighed: "Don't trust Rat with the questions, old son - we need to be a little more discerning than that. So I'll retain absolute executive control over the interview, while creating the illusion of democracy... democracy has f***ed up more than enough Morrissey interviews, thank you very much."


On the Saturday evening, Morrissey1959 paid a visit to the MorrisseysWorld chatroom, where he chatted to Chuck and Lizzy, and made some interesting revelations, including that his favourite Radiohead album is The Bends, calling 'Creep' iconic. He added that Radiohead had admitted that The Bends was basically a cover of Vauxhall and I.
Also on the subject of Vauxhall and I, M said, " V and I is beautiful but it's soft. I can churn out V and I songs in my sleep... I'm going for something a little more thrusting."
M1959 also revealed that he thought Morrisseysworld had been a mistake, and that he had wasted thousands of hours on it. Moz added that Ricky Gervais had written some of the parody sketches! Could this REALLY be true?

I have to say, when I read comments on my blog from people with names like 'Climmy Worseapple', it does make me wonder if Gervais, Brand etc are far more involved with Morrisseysworld than we think, and when I see the likes of 'Fancy123' subtly, and quite hilariously, changing the name Worseapple to Whorseapple, my suspicions are raised even further. It is still a DISTINCT POSSIBILITY that many of Morrissey's friends and entourage are involved in the whole MorrisseysWorld phenomenon, and 'characters' such as the misspelling 'Romina', the previously mentioned American grandmother 'Fancy123', the ridiculously intellectual 'Menippus' and the gay, football loving 'Broken', could ALL be either friends or employees of Moz, or they could all of course, just be genuine Morrissey fans. Could Morrissey's bodyguard, Liam Nammock, pass away his spare time by being a 'character'? And IS Morrissey's hairdresser, Damon the Kevin Phillips lookalike, playing the role of 'Broken'? Who knows? Will we EVER know?


RICKY GERVAIS - INVOLVED IN MW?

Our Mozzer also revealed to Chuck and Lizzy, that he had recently purchased an Aston Martin Virage, but again, is this true? Another revelation from the Saturday night chat, was that Moz had insisted that Letterman introduce him as, "iconic", and he added that NONE of us had picked up on this, and that he should have got Letterman to say "seminal artiste" instead, to make it more obvious.


ASTON MARTIN VIRAGE - OWNED BY THE MOZ?

Here are some more of the highlights from Morrissey1959's chat session of last Saturday. Unfortunately people quite often don't bother taking notes from these chat sessions, which is all well and good, and keeps it very personal, but if the same thing had happened when old JC was walking the earth, then NOBODY would have known about the fishes and the loaves, the curing of the sick, and his little ding dong with Mary Mag! What is more, ALL of the gospels would have had to have been completely made up! May I urge ANYBODY who happens to find themselves in the chatroom with Morrissey to PLEASE TAKE NOTES and then post them on the world's Number 1 Morrissey Blogsite thing, 'FollowingTheMozziah'! Thank you.
For those who know nothing of the MorrisseysWorld chatroom, it can be found here: http://chatroll.com/morrisseysworld-chat. It used to live at the bottom of the MW blogsite, but since that no longer exists, it just sits in cyberspace, waiting for somebody to pop in.

HIGHLIGHTS:

Morrissey1959 announced that both the MW blog and the twitter account were finished, saying, "Tweeting as MorrisseysWorld tomorrow would be like David Bowie slipping back into his Ziggy outfit and singing Starman with all the passion and conviction of an accountant with piles and a deadline. The blog and twitter are dead. Long live the chat room!"

"I promise at least two leisure centres in the UK in 2013."

At 9pm, M1959 posted a Youtube clip of Morrissey singing 'Pashernate Love' at the Shoreline Amphitheater in California from 1991. He then added, "Oh but Morrissey wouldn't look at Youtube. That's what they said of me until I mentioned Youtube in an interview."

In reply to being asked why people think they know what he would or wouldn't do, "I am the most open singer in pop history and I have said more than enough for seven lifetimes; consequently, people feel they are part of my life. They feel they are a part of me and I an a part of them. This is a consequence of being as open as a child and as complicated as a killer. Becoming an icon is similar to dying. In the end, you only exist as an image."

Somebody called 'Urban' then turned up in the chatroom, which annoyed both Lizzy and Chuck. To those who have ever been in the MW chatroom, they will probably be aware that Urban is somebody who just types meaningless nothings and obscenities, but I have often wondered if this is actually a Morrissey 'character', almost like a lunatic locked away in an asylum. Lizzy and Chuck got annoyed that Urban had arrived to spoil their intimate chat, but M1959 wrote, "Urban is human. He lacks love. Perhaps we should show him a faint flicker of affection." Urban then wrote that one of the girls had a c*nt full of VD, and Moz banned him! I suppose affection can only be stretched so far.

Despite me not being in the chat room, I apparently still managed to get a mention from Morrissey1959, with him saying, "TheRatsBack will change the nature of Western culture. He is destined to change the world, and he will do so by changing Sandown pier." I should add that I have no immediate plans to change Western culture, the world OR Sandown pier.


SANDOWN PIER - NO CHANGE


Having purposely taken myself away from the internet, for a week of relaxation, I was blissfully unaware of anything going on in the world of Morrissey, but on Wednesday, I took a very quick sneak into the Twitterdilly Arms. I was surprised to see that Morrissey had turned up in Ireland to watch a football match the previous evening with his cousin Robbie Keane, and I also was informed by Heathercat that Our Mozzer was growing impatient for the interview questions. She pointed me in the direction of the following posting that had been left on my blog, in the early hours of Tuesday morning:


When I informed Our Mozzer that the interview questions still aren't published, he replied: "Give an obese rat a rice cake and he thinks he's a serious talk radio journalist."

Later Our Mozzer stated: "The c*nt had better get a move on. I've blacklisted journalists before for turning up on-time. One expects a little more politeness as a seminal artiste."

'R'



MOZ IS SERVED TEA BY KEVIN PHILLIPS AT THE IRELAND MATCH, MUCH TO THE AMUSEMENT OF COUSIN ROBBIE


MOZ SIPS CHAMPAGNE WITH COUSIN ROBBIE



According to reports on twitter, Broken was tweeting during the Ireland game, which some took as proof that Broken ISN'T Morrissey, but Morrissey1959 once told us in the chat room that he IS Broken, and I'm sure that he would NEVER make things like that up! Before I returned to the swimming pool on Wednesday, I sent Broken a tweet apologizing for the delay with the interview, and told him that I would post it at the weekend. I then had no further contact with the outside world whilst I was away.

On my return home yesterday, I found the following posted on my blog from Wednesday evening:


Our Mozzer would like it known the offer of an exclusive thirty question interview for Following The Mozziah has been retracted.

Our Mozzer instructed me to inform you all that he apologises for this but unfortunately the pecuniary offer from FTM was grossly inadequate for an artiste of his calibre.

Our Mozzer muttered as poured himself some Ceylon: "That b*****d blogger has no respect for his elders. I wonder if it's that c*** from the NME behind it all?"

The interview offer had been retracted! Interestingly, the retraction comment was posted at 8.35pm on Wednesday evening. The reason I say 'interestingly', is because there would appear to have been much excitement on twitter on Wednesday night, with a number of people speculating that Morrissey was at Johnny Marr's concert in Dublin. Morrissey apparently sent a denial via our very own Manclad, informing him that he was dining at Claridges with Cousin Robbie! I have NO idea if Moz popped in to say hello to Johnny or if he was indeed dining with Robbie, but at 8.35pm, he was doing NEITHER, he was writing on my blog!


CLARIDGES IN DUBLIN


On the subject of Johnny Marr, I had a text this morning from my New York travelling companion, 'Midlife Matt', which said, "In disagreement over your review of Johnny Marr album. Obviously the words are embarrassingly bad at points but I really like the music. STS and I very much enjoyed the Shepherds Bush gig." WHERE is the disagreement? I totally agree that Johnny is a great musician and that the lyrics are bad! That's an AGREEMENT, not a disagreement.

Whilst I was away, the '@BrokenReturns' twitter account obviously re-opened, having closed down before I went, but I have returned to find that it is once again closed, so I am unable to see what he posted while I was away.

According to some comments that I have read, 'Morrissey1959' MAY have been in the chat room again on Thursday night, but if he was, NOBODY has left any notes of anything that was said. I must once again re-iterate, PLEASE don't keep things to yourselves, if Morrissey tells you something, however trivial it may seem, then share it, because one day, this blog WILL be read by ALL those fans who have missed out on the whole MW phenomenon, and they will want to know EVERYTHING!

A total of 165 comments were left on my blog whilst I was away, many from the Blue Rosers and Deluded Dozen, telling their stories of MorrisseysWorld, but there were also a number of other comments, including an anonymous one as follows:


why are people missing all the signs? MW twitter mentioned indecent books months ago and Morrissey quoted MW yet again. Isn't rat supposed to notice these signs?



DID MorrisseysWorld REALLY tweet about 'indecent books', as recently mentioned by Morrissey? I can't be expected to notice EVERYTHING, I just can't, it's impossible!

So, where do we go from here? Our Mozzer has said that the MW blog and twitter accounts won't be returning, Broken has gone, although many people no longer believe Morrissey is Broken anyway, the MW chat room remains fairly unused, and when it is used, nobody is reporting what is said. Have we reached the end?

21 comments:


  1. Welcome back Rats and I trust you are refreshed ?
    Great to have you back !

    May I correct you please ? Our Moz was actually at
    The Clarence in Dublin on Wednesday night, not
    Claridges.

    I am confused as to the identity of Broken too, given
    that they were tweeting during the Ireland/Austria match on
    Tuesday night and also when the Mozziah was dining
    in the Clarence.

    To be honest it feels a bit of a betrayal to take notes
    during the fascinating chat sessions. On the other hand
    I am always eager to hear what has been said by M1959.

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  4. Great to have you blogging again, Rats. I certainly hope this isn't the end, either for the MW story or for your blog. I most certainly don't think MW was a mistake and I'm very disappointed (yet not overly surprised) to hear that the blog and twitter are dead and buried - may they rest in peace. Hopefully Our Mozzer will still stop by the chatroom from time to time - I was thrilled to have the pleasure of chatting with him on Monday evening. Although Our Mozzer may have once said that he is Broken, he has also denied being Broken, and as we know, nothing is certain in MorrisseysWorld, which has always been part of its charm.

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  5. I am sad Our Mozzer feels that MW was a mistake. I still miss the blog terribly, it was my sanctuary from the gloom of real life.
    I unfortunately missed Morrissey1959 in chat, I hope he calls back again soon.

    It seems fitting that as the MW journey has come to an end it is still surrounded with an air of mystery. I will always remember it with the fondest of memories.

    Back to reality & work for me now, I wish all my fellow bloggers & BRS members a good day.

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  6. You want trivial? From the same night as Sandown pier:

    Morrissey1959: dining on figs

    Morrissey1959: fresh figs, grilled with melted stilton, red wine poached pear and a rocket salad with caramel jus

    Morrissey1959: And tasty, which is what all vegetarian food ought to be



    MeIsSorry

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  7. Two things concern me you appear to know everyones surname and the picture of moz at the game is the exact same picture that was sent to me that very night..granted it appears to be a photo of some tv screen i received my pic within seconds of it happening and you claim to have been off the pc this week yet you have the same picture

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    1. The pictures were all over twitter within seconds. I put them as my favourites myself... I also guess it isn't that difficult to find out surnames of Morrissey's staff.

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    2. Yes i think you and heather are right apols uncle whiskers

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  8. Of course the pic is easy to explain but the surnames rat too close to home for my liking

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    1. Unless I missed something, I only see that Liam's surname is identified. It was posted in a comment on Solow a few days ago, which also identified Damon the hairdresser.

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    2. Aah mystery solved.. thx heather xx

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    3. Ha, Ratty is a very naughty rat though for using Solow as his source! Shame on you!

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  9. Glad to see you back Ratty. Thanks for the kind words about me in your blog. Hope you, Moz and all the #BlueRoseSociety had a pleasant and healthy Easter. I did. Holidays are always nice when I do not have to cook the meal as we had it at my daughter's home. And as a bonus, my brother, who we hadn't seen for a few years, surprised us all by stopping by. Although, my brother-in-law, who had throat surgery last fall, did not show up as he was suppose to, seems he is having A difficult time handling the post op/radiation(Both brother & BIL are confirmed bachelors)And as families are apt to do, decided that in a few days' we will some how do an intervention of sorts for him. Well, in signing off, I do hope the Easter Bunny was good to all of you. Here he was extremely generous to the children of the family. As for me, I am grateful for his left over treats and the ones that some how did not make it into their baskets.

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  10. It was an honor to have been in the same chatrm w/ Our Mozzer on MW chat...

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  11. Signs are everywhere
    Our mozzer was in chat room 4/2/13 :-)

    I do.miss ur.blog rat

    thank you

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  12. Not an indecent mention, but NotMorrissey did say something like 'there is more to life than books you know, but not much more'. Recycled because I am sure I saw this a few times. Other book mention I recall was about Dickie writing the MW book, Marcus doing the film, and Rats blogging about it.

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  13. Hello Rat! Just came back from my Easter's holiday at parents country home with no internet, but with a lot of food and, of course, no meat for me! I have to remark, once again, that I'm just a pure and genuine Morrissey's fan and no more, but, of course, a very mispelling! Thanks for all the news about Morrissey and the update about the chat! One of this days I'll have to pay a vist here, it looks like an amazing place! I hoping for Morrissey truly purchased an Aston Martin Virage! It is a jewell car, totally hand made in UK and very expensive, about 250.000 euro, as an engineer I know quite everything about cars. Anyway I miss the blog and I don't understand why Our Mozzer said it was a mistake! Still hoping for a great come back! About names and surnames I've to say that I saw the famous hairdresser more than one time, and I don't remember where, I read his surename "Anacreonte", typical surname from the South of Italy, Calabria or Sicily, I don't know, anyway he looks like a fine person. Dear Rat, you know better than me, on internet you could find everything, but you could loose your minds! Take care ratty, hoping for catch you on twitter, what about the chart? Ciao!

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  14. Cor blimey what larks we had in the chat room with the Mozziah last night.
    It was a lengthy session on and off for about four hours.
    Methinks this was because Our Moz was also watching the footie on ITV, but I
    could be wrong !!

    Much was divulged and all of it was very interesting. However I promised myself
    not to report on the details as did other members of 'Blue Rose ' who were present.

    Suffice to say, eternal thanks to M1959 who is always entertaining and more to
    the point honest and uncompromising. Could it be that I like you ?

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  15. I can't believe I missed so much that was about to happen but never did!

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