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Monday, 29 April 2013

Day 593 - The Forgotten Blue Rose Society Interview

Just over three weeks ago, Our Mozzer invited members of the Blue Rose Society to ask him thirty questions, which we did. The questions have thus far remained unanswered, so during this quiet period, I have decided to post them again, in the hope that Our Mozzer may take time out from his busy bedsit life to answer. Meanwhile, TRM has been photographed out and about in LA, whilst '@leonardnewell' tweeted on April 23rd to say, "Just landed in LA. Who was on our plane? Only bloody Morrissey."


So, let's try again:

Q1: From Climmy Worseapple
Sometimes, when I cry, I sit with a mirror before me and imagine that I am my own nonexistent disillusioned long-term partner, looking with scorn at my puffy, leaking face - immune to the rotting diseases of affection and empathy for "myself" thanks to a tough course of painful injections and some hard-earned antibodies. Your recent release of 'Last of the Famous International Playboys', did not make it into the Top 100 in the UK, did this disappoint you?
The Last Of The Famous International Playboys Digital Single Artwork

Q2: From girlwithout
Question from me for Our Mozzer. When he met you at a recent Hollywood party, Gristle Bandage commented that you were like Bette Davis and Garbo, sat in a corner uniquely like someone from another era. How do you feel about this comparison and is there some other Hollywood star that you would have preferred to be compared to?

Q3: From Chuck Norrissey
Ok here comes my question. Don't be disappointed. Dear Our Mozzer, was there anything about this whole journey that surprised you, that came unexpected - concerning your followers/fans and/or media? Was it a mudslide, or did it all develop and unfold according to your plans?

Q4: From Uncle Halfwit
This is ridiculous, you are just a "dickhead pulling a scam." You are just "some wanker who hatched a plan to make a film about internet gullibility", with the subject, "Morrissey fans." How long do you possibly think you can get away with pretending to be Morrissey before you are caught out? Tops P.

Q5: From Mme de StaĆ«l
What is your favourite cover version of one of your songs? And is there any song of another artist(e) that you think would be worthwhile covering?

Q6: From Lizzycatmoz
My question for Morrissey AKA Our Mozzer is, and I consider this to be ' personal' however not ' personal life.' Having been extremely ill and on IV drips for 5 weeks, I'm sure the
experience changed you, but what I'd really like to know, but am afraid to ask, so am relying on that b**tard Rat to completely change and 'sex up' my question a bit, is:  You have used lots of homoerotic imagery in your art over the years, and yet I have found you quite flirty, do you bat for both sides? 


Q7: From TRB
I'm sorry about Lizzy's deeply personal question, I did warn them not to, but they just ignored me. Let's cut to the chase and get down to the nitty gritty, do you have a fold away sofa bed in your bedsit, or a proper bed that takes the place of a couch?

Q8: On Behalf Of  Marcus 'The Greek' Marcou
I saw it as my calling to travel to Manchester with a Blue Rose, but I couldn't get it to you. I have recently released my debut feature film, 'Papadopolous and Sons', would you do me the honour of watching it and letting me know what you think?


Q9: From Vulgar1mkela
I was so honored that you took the blue rose ring from me in Moz Angeles but what happened to it after I gave it to you and have you any plans for it?


Q10: From Anonymous
Morrissey needs to realize that he has totally screwed himself because of his affiliation with this site and that horrid blog that existed. Had he in fact cared about his career and reputation as a respected artist, he would have come out and denounced both of this (sic) dumps. The true sadness lies in the fact that he has not, and the devolving that has taken place continues to reach new lows. All of this stupidity and the Blue Rose and the ring--come on Morrissey, no wonder you have become a caricature of what you used to be. When will The Smiths be reforming? (Note from Ed - Sorry Our Mozzer, I don't know how this one slipped through the net, but NO Moz interview is complete without some twat asking a Smiths question.)

Hello. What inspired you to start the blog initially, did you have any objectives, and if so, do you feel you have achieved them?

Hello, me again. What are the greatest similarities & differences between Our Mozzer & TRM? 

Q 13: From Girl On Bike
The MorrisseysWorld story has been a phenomenon. What are your best and worst moments of the  journey?

Q 14: From Broken
Why did your image mutate around the late 80s and early 90s when you went from soft wallflower to brusquely assertive? Was it a conscious decision?


Q 15: From JJazmine
Despite everything that has occurred on this 3-4 year journey are you satisfied with what your creation has become? God once flooded the earth to purge his paradise of the evils of humanity. Is this "end" your attempt to put our faith to the test? Will MW rise again from the tomb of your mind? 

Q 16 From heathercat

Many of us have written comments about what MW has meant to us. What has the MW journey meant to you and what have you learned from it?
Q 17: From Fluff Rat
What the f**k shall I do with the '@MorrisseysWorld' twitter account that is currently in my possession. Will you PLEASE take it back, and rise like a parody phoenix from the parody ashes? 
It's a picture question from me, and you MUST know the answer because, after all, all you do all day is sit in your bedsit finding out ALL there is to know about Morrissey, just so that you can pretend to be him! So come on, let's see if you REALLY know your Moz stuff, who are the two people in this picture?: (Note from Ed, sorry for Talbot's slightly disrespectful tone, but I quite like his question.)

Q 19: From Anastasia Ames
Dear Moz, In your last interview you said you'd like to come back to Mexico in June. If you do, will the US also have a chance to see you again? 

Q 20: From fancy123
I noticed Climmy Worseapple's question. I myself do not have to sit in front of a mirror to feel that crappy and alone, but if I needed a song to listen to, I would use 'Wide to Receive' It is a beautifully crafted song, but one that can leave you feeling completely alone and useless. Do you have any peccadilloes you can talk about?

What's wrong with hairy backs? That isn't my main question: The very first time you sang in front of an audience, how did you get through it since you were obviously so shy, and what gave you the confidence to do it again, and again? Do you suffer from nerves at all now?


Q 22: From Clover Dean
Dear Morressay, Will you one day tell the world that you know about the Blue Rose Society? Please sir take care of yourself, hoping for your return & I love you so...
Thank you for your time~
Rosy Clover Dean
BRS forever

Q 23: From romina
This is very silly, but I like to be silly, sometimes,in Rome there is a urban legend about you, it says that you use to wash by yourself your dresses in a little laundry near Piazzale Flaminio. Is it true?
Roma-Piazzale Flaminio

Q 24: From Leslie
"Our Mozzer": What is your belief of the after-life? Do you think we just die and go to a better place, or do you believe in the spirit world - ghosts and hauntings, I suppose you'd call it...?

Q 25: From Mozkidkyle
Hello, as President of the Blue Rose Society, Rat says I am entitled to ask as many questions as I like, so here are my questions for you.
1. Did you get the BlueRose Society t-shirt that I brought for you?
2. Is there another cologne that you wear besides Com De Garcan?
3. Are you going to do a book signing in New York?
4. Why did you pick Long Island to start the Tour again?
5. Will we ever meet again , and did you read what I gave you?

Your Friend, KYLE


Q 26: From heathercat
The fact that Morrissey once said, "I don't know if I even exist offstage" could make one wonder who is actually more real - TRM or NotMorrissey. All I do know is that NotMorrissey's identity doesn't concern me. Hirsute bedsit dweller or not, he's intriguing, brilliant, hilarious and mesmerizing, will he be returning to twitter? 

Q 27: From Tiffany Tidychuff (Bond girl or Carry On character? - Ed)
Like Tubby Talbot, it's a picture question from me too, who is the person featured on your drum kit?:


Q 28: From comrade harps
As a good athiest skeptic, I don't believe in astrology, but even as a fellow Gemini (I'm a 23 May to Morrissey's 22 May) I'm finding this all a bit confusing. If it is the real Morrissey behind all this (as us Deluded Dozen believe) then he cannot own up to that as he needs to maintain the mystery and keep the distance, all the while giving us nudge-nudge wink-wink signs. Is that the post-modernist game being played out here?

Q 29: From TRB
You have made many, many predictions of things that Morrissey would do, and HE HAS DONE THEM. You predicted back in 2011 that he would take his shirt off in London, and despite him not having taken it off in recent times, HE TOOK IT OFF! You predicted that Morrissey would accept a red rose on stage, and despite him not having accepted ANY flowers on stage in years, HE ACCEPTED A RED ROSE IN POMONA! You predicted that Morrissey would accept a Blue Rose, AND despite fans offering Morrissey gladioli and numerous other flowers throughout the last year, he refused to take ANY of them, and yet accepted BLUE ROSES IN BOTH NEW YORK AND LA! You predicted that Morrissey would play in Argentina, AND HE DID! The list goes on and on. Add to this the huge list of 'coincidences' over the past two years, including you mentioning a toothbrush on stage in Long Island just hours after I had blogged about losing mine, and yet STILL your fans refuse to believe you are Morrissey. I even asked you in an  interview last May about the NME court case, and the answer was posted  on True To You, but STILL nobody believed. Forget about the media, WHAT do you think Morrissey would have to do to FINALLY  get his OWN FANS to believe? 

Q 30: From TRB
What now for MorrisseysWorld and the Blue Rose Society? Can we have another prediction please?

I shall now return to watch cricket, but if Our Mozzer answers the questions, I'll be back.

Friday, 26 April 2013

Day 590 - I Don't Like Cricket....

It has now been seven days since I last made a blog entry. The reason for this isn't because I have suddenly lost interest in the word of The Mozziah, far from it, it is just that he has completely gone to ground. There hasn't been a peep from either Morrissey, Our Mozzer, Broken or even 'R' in the past week, and so I have turned to my other passion, cricket. Here is a summary of my week:

Day 584 - Saturday April 20th
Watched eldest son play cricket in glorious English sunshine.

Day 585 - Sunday April 21st
Led my football team to a 1-0 cup final defeat in the morning. Fell on my sword and resigned my managerial position at lunchtime. Played cricket in the afternoon in bitter English wind.

Day 586 - Monday April 22nd
Watched youngest son play cricket in bitter English wind.

Day 587 - Tuesday April 23rd
Cleaned out my swimming pool in glorious English sunshine.

Day 588 - Wednesday April 24th
Watched Hampshire play cricket in Southampton in glorious English sunshine.

Day 589 - Thursday April 25th
Went for meeting with my Chemical Pathologist who informed me that, for the first time ever, I have the correct Triglyceride level. I now have no excuse not to score a hundred this season! It is obviously the imbalance of my triglycerides that has impaired my batting ability all these years. English weather irrelevant today.

My week of virtually wall to wall cricket, included me listening exclusively to 'Kill Uncle' on every car journey to every cricket ground. The new 2013 version of the album has grabbed me like I would never have believed, and it really does feel like a new record. Singing '(I'm) The End of the Family Line' at the top of your voice, with the sun shining and the car windows all open, is extremely therapeutic.

Today I will again be watching cricket, and tomorrow, and Sunday, and Monday. I shall abandon this blog thing until either Morrissey or Our Mozzer return.

Hit Counts on MorrisseysWorld - 362,332 up 1200 in the last week.
Hit Counts on FTM, which has been just as dormant, and is only here to follow MW - 194,116 up 3700 in the last week.

You couldn't make this up.

Friday, 19 April 2013

Day 583 - Friday 19th April 2013

My 'Mozziah Prayer' of yesterday has been answered, with the MorrisseysWorld blog returning with a hilarious new article. Our Mozzer has taken the TTY statement written by Morrissey about Thatcher, and turned it into a similar statement as if written by former Smiths drummer, Mike Joyce, about Morrissey. There are some very funny lines, including this one: "There will be no report as to how "the British people have succeeded in downloading Ding dong the seminal c*nt is dead to number 2", while a certain dead 'seminal c**t' can't even get a record deal posthumously, and we are engulfed in Third Reich manoeuvers (This is not America - don't forget the 'o!') as Morrissey assumes the role of sensible adult, finger-wagging at that naughty public who refuse to buy his latest mid-paced rock album with session musicians, and twelve songs, and three duffs, and one song about naked men." Genius, f**king genius, and I must ask, WHO would sign a posthumous record deal on Morrissey's behalf, his mum?


As I write this, nearly twenty four hours since the new MW article was posted, only NINE MorrisseysWorlders have left a comment. NINE!!! Where did it all go so wrong? How can a site that has had 361,132 hits, and once attracted hundreds, if not dozens of comments after each article, have fallen so far off the radar of Moz fans? What happened to the 8,000 twitter followers Our Mozzer had acquired before he forgot to re-activate his account? Is MorrisseysWorld mirroring Morrissey's career far more realistically than we could ever have predicted?

Meanwhile, former MorrisseysWorlder RosyMires has put her head back around the doors of the Twitterdilly Arms. Even SHE must be struggling to find a reason as to WHY Morrissey would use the words 'Order of the World', but if she is starting to question whether she got all this fantastically wrong, I doubt she would ever admit it. Mires has gone too far in the opposite direction to be able to swallow humble pie and admit that she was wrong. The reason for her visit to The Arms, was to post a photo of Morrissey's house. Has she resorted to stalking TRM in an attempt to prove he ISN'T Our Mozzer?

Embedded image permalink

Broken has once again disappeared from twitter, and NOBODY has contacted me to reclaim '@MorrisseysWorld'. The story continues.

Thursday, 18 April 2013

Day 582 - Thursday 18th April 2013

Morrissey's True-To-You website crashed yesterday after comedian Stephen Fry led his 5.7 miliion twitter followers to the site. Fry added a link to TTY as he tweeted, "Wow! Go it, Morrissey! The Mozzer NEVER holds back."

This isn't the first time that Fry has shown his admiration for Morrissey. In Nov 2009 he tweeted, "I hope we're all sitting at the feet of the divinity that is Morrissey on Desert Island Discs..." and then followed it up with, "Oh, when Morrissey is teasy and funny and silly and sweet I just want to DIE of pleasure..."

 In September 2010 Fry was interviewed on twitter by Johann Hari and tweeted, "Celibacy is just one of things that the Mozzer and I have in common..."


It would appear that Fry is a fan of the man he affectionately calls 'The Mozzer', but 'Our Mozzer' has at times been quite scathing about Fry on twitter, so is it that Morrissey doesn't feel the same affection for Fry, or is it just one of Our Mozzer's little jokes, and the reality is that Morrissey DOES like Fry? On the face of things, I would have thought that Stephen Fry would be the sort of person that Morrissey would find amusing and engaging, but with Morrissey you can never KNOW 'anything'. Our Mozzer was also scathing towards Ricky Gervais on twitter, but Our Mozzer has since claimed that Gervais is involved with MorrisseysWorld, so who knows what is true and what is not! For all any of us know, Morrissey might actually like Richard Madeley.... perhaps not!


Another person who CAN'T be taken at face value is 'Broken', and yesterday, he once again returned to the Twitterdilly Arms. Broken would appear to be Morrissey's 'opposite', as he regularly tweets about his love for meat and his dislike for PETA, among other things. Broken likes nothing more than to be provocative, although when he isn't being provocative, he is usually posting pictures of semi naked footballers and pop stars, which one can assume TRM would NEVER do if he had a twitter account, although presuming what Morrissey 'would' or 'wouldn't' do is NOT advisable, as we have all learnt in the past 18 plus months.

Here are Broken's highlights from yesterday's visit to The Twitterdilly Arms:

The TTY statement as good as an MW article?

Did you notice the familiar themes in TTY statement?

I am as hated as MW is loved. I barely exist; to the extent I do exist, I am nothing but vulgar regret.

Well, I don't believe it's really Morrissey behind MW!

I'm cooking more meat!!!

Always. Since I realised I have nothing to live for, life couldn't be better.

That's it from me for today. Despite Morrissey's TTY statement of two days ago receiving LOTS of media attention, and plenty of discussion among the Solowers, NOBODY has questioned WHY Morrissey used the phrase 'Order of the World'. Not even Stephen Fry or any of his 5.7 million twitter followers have picked up on it. This whole MW phenomenon really MIGHT go on forever, in which case, we must hope and pray that Our Mozzer brings back '@MorrisseysWorld', and returns to The Twitterdilly Arms.


Our Mozzer, who art in bedsit
deluded be thy name.
Please Twit Arms come.
Thy scorn be done
in make belief pub as it is in press releases.
Give us this day our daily quotes,
and forgive Marcus the use of a fish and chip shop in his feature film,
as we forgive solowers who trespass against us.
And lead us not back to The Smiths,
but deliver us from Joyce.
For thine is the MorrisseysWorld,
and the bald head, and the hairy back,
for ever and ever.
Our Moz

Wednesday, 17 April 2013

Day 581 - "Surely How I feel Is Not Nothing?"

The MorrisseysWorld blog has gone, but Our Mozzer certainly hasn't, he has disguised himself as Morrissey, and issued a statement on the True-To-You website.

The new statement on TTY, entitled, 'Surely how I feel is not nothing?', has been signed by Morrissey, but much of the wording is a mirror image of the message Our Mozzer has been giving on the MorrisseysWorld blog, especially with regard to the illuminati and the 'New World Order'.

In the first sentence of his TTY statement, Morrissey/Our Mozzer writes, "I have seen a lack of truth that we dared not believe existed in modern Britain." This is immediately followed up by, "Margaret Thatcher has left the order of the world." WOW! It is SO blatant, that Morrissey may as well have written the actual words 'New World Order', but TRM (The Real Morrissey) probably doesn't feel comfortable enough to do that, as potentially it would be a career wrecker. If TRM declared that he believed a New World Order existed, the media, along with So-Low, would rejoice in the fact that Morrissey had completely and utterly, lost the plot.


Perhaps I am wrong, and perhaps Morrissey would be comfortable enough to mention the 'New World Order', but MAYBE he just prefers to add a little bit of mystery. Perhaps Morrissey would like his fans to OPEN THEIR EYES, and discover the REAL meaning of his thinly veiled TTY message for themselves, but if that IS what he wants, then he had better not hold his breath, as his fans failed miserably in discovering his previous 'veiled offering', ie, MorrisseysWorld.

Leaving out the word 'New' from his TTY statement, makes NO difference whatsoever to the message, and if Morrissey's fans bother to google the words 'Margaret Thatcher order of the world', they will be led to the 'New World Order' and her involvement in it. There is NO other reason for Morrissey to use the words "order of the world" in his statement, other than to flag up his interests in the 'New World Order', and to give us MorrisseysWorlders YET ANOTHER sign, but will ANYBODY other than us MorrisseysWorlders pick up on it?

Over at the So-low place, they are already calling the statement "a rant", although bizarrely, one of the So-lowers who was VERY dismissive of MorrisseysWorld, Crystal Geezer, writes "This isn't about Thatcher. It's about the BBC and how the media molds the minds of the non-thinker." By jove, I think he's got it, but will he (I think Crystal is a he) be able to make the link to MorrisseysWorld, and realise that Morrissey's THREE statements on TTY about NOT being involved in MorrisseysWorld, were just his way of showing people that they need to OPEN THEIR EYES, and look beyond what they are told? Somehow, I doubt it.


Morrissey's TTY statement goes on to say, "In thought, we have killed Thatcher off a million times, but now that we have the reality of her death, the Metropolitan Police have set up new laws against us, and within paragraphs of law, we are not allowed to register our feelings so that anyone might overhear them." WOW! The words "thought" and "police" and "overhear them" ALL in the same sentence. All VERY 1984 and all VERY much the thoughts of Our Mozzer from the MW blog, ESPECIALLY his piece entitled 'The Morrissey World Order'.

The statement continues, "Echoes of any Middle Eastern patch whose troubles are thought too uncivilized for a democratic England where chivalrous respect is afforded to "freedom", and where we are all servile to "democracy." It is, of course, The Big Lie." WOW! Notice that Morrissey doesn't write 'a big lie', he writes "The Big Lie", which is of course, the phrase used by both Adolf Hitler and George Orwell in 1984, but more recently, it has been used by the likes of David Icke, when talking about.... The Illuminati.


This will all be FAR too uncomfortable for most Morrissey fans (and the public in general), which is why it is far easier to just dismiss everything Morrissey says as "a rant".

Morrissey's TTY statement concludes by saying, "modern media reporting in Britain is a disturbing fog of taboos and prejudices, reviving the divisions that Thatcher hatched, whilst hiding her horrors. Even in death, Thatcher remains 'the enemy within.' And the truth sleeps."

Apart from the media lying, and governments lying, the OTHER big deception is religion. I have often wondered how so called intelligent people, such as world leaders, ALL seem to believe in a God of some sort, but I have finally realised, THEY DON'T, but religion is a great way of scaring the masses, and keeping them in check.... but, perhaps that is a story for another day.

Today's story is about Thatcher's funeral. I haven't bothered watching it, as I have NO interest in her, but the news reports will all be full of phrases like, "thousands of mourners lined the streets of London to say farewell to a much loved leader", where as anybody with an ounce of intelligence will realise that in truth, the reports should be, "thousands of 'tourists' lined the streets of London, not to mourn, but because there was 'an event'."


"Surely how I feel is not nothing?" asks Morrissey. No, it's not "nothing", but what you feel is only recognised and felt by a few, where as the majority are happy to be told what to eat, what to think, when to pray and even what music to listen to. Don't let it frustrate you, let it do what it has always done, inspire you to write, educate, and entertain the few of us who DO understand. 'Surely How I Feel Is Not Nothing?' even L'OO'KS like a song title!

Viva Blue Rose

Tuesday, 16 April 2013

Day 580 - Taste The Hatred

Morrissey's brilliant re-mastered release of Kill Uncle, which NOBODY expected to chart, has unsurprisingly, failed to chart! The re-issue of 'The Last of the Famous International Playboys' has also not entered the Top 100 Singles Chart, which again, I for one never thought it would, in fact, my very first question to Our Mozzer in the recent thirty question interview was, "Do you think it will reach the Top 100, and do you care?" We haven't yet received Our Mozzer's answers to the questions, but I doubt for one minute that he expected it to chart, although over at the So-Low place, they are treating this non event as the end of Morrissey's career. Here is Uncle Skinny's reaction:

"It was an ill-judged release from a person whose chart career is going down the pan. All facts. In fact, since we could do with facts, what are the sales figures and positions (UK) for these releases, compared with sales figures and positions (UK) for his previous albums and singles releases? What does the trajectory look like?



You can taste the hatred as it seeps through Skinny's words. WHY does this man hate Morrissey SO much?  "Chart career going down the pan"? Morrissey has NEVER failed to score below the Top 8 with a 'new' album EVER, and whilst we're dealing with FACTS, Morrissey's last album, 'Years of Refusal' reached Number 3. How is THAT 'going down the pan'?  And if it were going down the pan, WHY would Skinny take such pleasure in that? WHY IS Skinny running a Morrissey website? WHY? WHY? WHY? Last week, Skinny was boasting how he would be downloading 'Ding Dong! The Witch Is Dead' (which incidentally didn't reach number 1), whilst us Morrissey fans were downloading 'The Kid's A Looker'. You couldn't make this up!

I know I shouldn't keep on about Skinny, but by going on Mastermind, and by running a Morrissey website, the man has made himself a high profile Morrissey fan, so I suppose I expect him to be 'on our side'. To me, being a Morrissey or Smiths fan, has always been a bit like 'Us Against the World'. People who don't 'get' Morrissey are always quick to have a go, and I, along with thousands of other fans, have spent thirty years trying to explain what it is that we see and hear that others don't. I have always presumed that it is the same for ALL Moz fans, and I would expect those who run a Morrissey website to be particularly protective toward their idol, but I have been SO naive in my expectations! But WHAT IS THE POINT? WHAT does Skinny get out of having a place to show his hatred for everything Morrissey now does? I honestly believe that he 'USED' to like Morrissey, but now that he obviously no longer does, WHY doesn't he just walk away? The ironic thing is, if an 'outsider' were to have a pop about Morrissey, Skinny would probably still defend him.... or perhaps not.

 Rosy Mires, Still.I.Cling and Cathy5 ALL abandoned MorrisseysWorld to become friends with Skinny, presumably because of a common interest in Morrissey, and yet all I EVER read from Skinny is constant criticism of Morrissey. The MorrisseysWorlders are so full of love, the Solowers are SO full of hate. Is this all just a bizarre dream I'm having? Is it still September 14th 2011?

As I mentioned yesterday, Morrissey is an artist, and with these re-mastered albums, surely it is the equivalent of a painter, 'touching up' a painting? Too many changes, and it no longer remains the same painting, but the odd stroke here and there, enables the artist to feel happier about his work. The audience/viewer/critic is irrelevant, the artist is doing it for himself. On a much smaller scale, when I write my blog, if I don't like how something flows, I HAVE to change it. It doesn't matter to me if NOBODY were ever to read what I had written, but if I  hadn't written it in the way 'I' wanted it to be written, I wouldn't be happy.

I cannot stop playing the 'touched up' version of 'Kill Uncle', it flows SO much better than the original, and the addition of 'Pashernate Love' and 'East West' into the middle of the album, bring a completely new feel to it. I have gone from only really liking two or three tracks from the original 'Kill Uncle', to there now only being one track that I don't particularly care for ('Found, Found, Found'). I've even found a love for 'Our Frank', which I was never really fond of before, but the tracks that I have really, really fallen in love with are 'Asian Rut', 'Driving Your Girlfriend Home', 'The Harsh Truth Of The Camera Eye', 'There's A Place In Hell For Me And My Friends' (the version on the 2013 album is MUCH better than the original) and my absolute favourite, '(I'm) The End Of The Family Line', which works SO much better by just being the final track.

To anybody who hasn't bothered buying 'Kill Uncle 2013', as they didn't see that there was much difference from the original, I would urge them to make the purchase, and find out what I'm going on about, or at the very least, burn a cd of the songs, and put them in the new track order, the difference is amazing.


So what DO Skinny, Sean Calder and the rest of the Solowers actually WANT from Morrissey? They no longer like the songs that he is writing, they don't like his band, they don't like him 'touching up' his own art, so WHAT do they want? I for one wouldn't care if Morrissey were to NEVER release another album EVER. He has given us enough quality songs to last a life time. What MorrisseysWorld has reinforced, is that Morrissey is a really witty and clever writer, and I for one, would really, really love to see him start writing plays/screen plays/films or comedy. Rather selfishly, I would also like to see him carry on singing live, but Morrissey will do whatever he WANTS to do, which is EXACTLY as it should be.


And finally for now, and probably for a while, as Our Mozzer seems to have completely disappeared, a few members of the Blue Rose Society have picked up on the fact that Morrissey told Victoria Wood that he doesn't drink coffee, where as Our Mozzer often mentions drinking coffee. So, which one is lying? Interestingly, Morrissey laughed when he told Victoria that he never drank coffee, so perhaps he was having a little joke. A few of the BRS are also still struggling with the fact that Broken was tweeting during the Ireland v Austria football match, when it is known Morrissey was sat with Robbie Keane. Maybe we were all deluded after all!

*Goes off singing* Ooh, I don't want to be judged anymore, I don't want to be judged, I would sooner be loved, I would sooner be, just blindly loved.

Saturday, 13 April 2013

Day 577 - Ding Dong! The Chart Is Dead

On Thursday night, Morrissey appeared on BBC 1, being interviewed by Victoria Wood about tea. Morrissey appeared relaxed and in good spirits. I was half expecting to see him give an 'O' sign, but he didn't, in fact, there were no signs at all, although he DID raise his eyebrows when Victoria mentioned that she'd just been to 'Tea & Sympathy', the tea shop that I just so happened to use as the setting for my parody interview last October (See here: I have NO idea why Morrissey would raise his eyebrows at the mention of this particular New York tea shop!


There has been no recent news from Our Mozzer, and I must therefore presume that he is busy either organizing tours or pondering on the thirty questions set to him by the Blue Rose Society.

The cricket season has started pretty much in the same vein as the last one, with the first matches I was due to watch, being rained off! Will this rain EVER stop?


Since the death of The Right Honorable Baroness Lady Margaret 'Milk Snatcher' Thatcher, a social media campaign has gotten under way in Britain, to try and get the song 'Ding Dong! The Witch Is Dead' to Number 1. I, for one, will NOT be downloading it, for two reasons.

Firstly, I believe downloading this song is a pointless exercise, what does it achieve? It is no good the people of Britain moaning that they were unhappy with Thatcher's leadership NOW, they should have shown that they were not prepared to tolerate her when she was in power, and YES, there were riots on the streets, and YES, the IRA tried to bomb her, but NOBODY actually stormed 10 Downing Street and dragged her to Trafalgar Square to string her up, that just isn't the British way!

When Thatcher ruled Britain, Morrissey showed his hatred for her by writing and recording a song called 'Margaret on the Guillotine', a dreamy and quite tender ballad with an unbelievably strong lyric, asking the question, 'When will you die?'
  Morrissey, a poet of his generation, was expressing his hatred for Thatcher in the same way that the Sex Pistols showed their hatred for the the monarchy, with 'God Save the Queen', but if the people don't respond to such rally cries, and take NO action, then nothing changes, and although many people bought 'God Save the Queen', agreeing with the sentiment of the song, NOBODY was SO outraged that they actually gathered the masses together, and chased the monarchy out of town. For an uprising to happen, a country would have to be REALLY on it's knees, ie, the masses would have to have nowhere to live and nothing to eat. While the masses remain dry, fed and watered, they WON'T take action because the pain isn't painful enough!


The only people to benefit from sales of 'Ding Dong! The Witch is Dead', is Time Warner, who own the rights to the song. By all means, encourage the people of Britain to have parties and celebrate the death of the wicked witch, and dance and sing 'Ding Dong!', just like The Munchkins did in 'The Wizard of Oz', but WHY bother downloading the song and wasting 79p? It doesn't achieve ANYTHING! What the masses should really be doing, is storming Downing Street and insisting on change, but they won't, everybody will continue to moan and groan, and some may even bother to vote at elections (18% turnout at the Manchester Central by-election last November), but although the faces behind the desks change, and even the parties in charge change, the system doesn't, and there in lies the problem! Nothing changes, and buying 'Ding Dong! The Witch Is Dead' will have zero effect on anything.


Of course the second, and more important reason that I won't be downloading 'Ding Dong!', is that my collection of UK Number 1 Singles will finally, finally, come to an end if it claims the top spot. I thought my collection had ended a few weeks ago, when 'Thriftshop' by Macklemore went to Number 1 as a download only, but luckily for me, the demand from the German market once again meant that a CD single was manufactured, and the collection limped on. I STILL have no idea why the Germans are continuing to insist on record companies releasing cds, but I'm glad they are.

The reason that 'Ding Dong! The Witch is Dead' would bring my collection to an end, is because it would be the FIRST 'single' EVER to top the UK 'singles' chart, despite NEVER having been released as a single, it is an album track! How it qualifies as a 'single', when it's NOT a 'single', I really don't know, but the 'Official Charts Company' have said that it qualifies for the singles chart, so there we have it. The song actually only lasts 50 seconds, so it will also be the shortest song to ever top the charts. It isn't even a 'song' in it's own right, it comes from a three song medley in the film, and although the British press have spent all week calling it a Judy Garland song, as all good friends of Dorothy know, she DIDN'T sing the song! Dorothy was totally unaware of who the wicked witch even was, so why would she celebrate her death, it was The Munchkins who sang it! I would guess that the vast majority of those currently downloading 'Ding Dong!' have no real idea who Thatcher was, they are just jumping on a bandwagon.


So, if 'Ding Dong!' reaches the top spot, WHO ARE these Muchkin singers who can celebrate their chart success? Well, NOBODY knows! The three singers who sang on the original film recording were  NOT in the film, they were session singers who recorded the songs, and then had their voices speeded up to sound munchkinesque. So, not only is the 'singles' chart just about to change forever, and become a 'song' chart, but the 'artist' of the first non single to top the charts is unknown. Many people don't want 'Ding Dong!' to reach the top of the chart, as they see it as being in bad taste, I don't think that it's in bad taste at all, I just don't want it to reach the top so that my collection can keep going, but with these ridiculous chart rules in place, even if 'Ding Dong!' fails to reach the top spot, it is just a matter of time before another album track claims the number 1 position. Ding Dong! The 'singles' chart is dead!

All issues of the chart dying aside, I find it quite interesting that the actual singers of this weeks possible Number, aren't known. The whole idea of WHO owns a song, or WHO has the right to mess with a song, or album, came up this week, when I got into a debate with somebody called Sean Calder (@Tony_LeMesmer) on twitter. I had tweeted to say how much I was enjoying the new 'Kill Uncle' release. Kill Uncle has always been my least favourite Morrissey album, but the re-release, with the new tracks added and the new positioning of the tracks on the album, have, in my opinion, completely transformed it. It is like a new album, and I just can't stop playing it. It is amazing what a few little changes can make. Sean Calder disagrees, saying, "Why is Pashernate Love on it when it wasn't recorded during the album & had a different band on it & producer?" As far as I see it, Morrissey can do whatever he likes with his art, but not according to Sean, who says, "It's not Morrissey's album. Every song on it he co-wrote with Mark Nevin or Alan Winstanley. Did he ask them for their opinions on changing the album? Or adding tracks that weren't recorded during the session & without them?"


The answers to Sean's questions are 'of course not', and why SHOULD Morrissey ask their permission? Just like the session singers who were used to voice The Munchkins, Nevin and Winstanley were just there to aid the artist, ie the man whose name is on the record, and who creates the  art. Would Van Gogh have needed the permission of the paint manufacturer or the canvas maker before making changes to his art? No, they were merely components of the art. Kill Uncle 2013 is Morrissey's updated Mona Lisa. Yes Morrissey could have added tracks like 'I've Changed My Plea To Guilty', which Sean Calder suggested, but in many ways, that would have made the album too perfect, and it was NEVER a perfect album, so it HAS to maintain some flaws, which thankfully, IT DOES, and I for one, am loving it!


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