No sooner had I left than BAM (No, not the Brooklyn Academy of Music, that has nothing to do with anything here, except for the fact that they keep sending me regular emails telling me what's on at their lovely theatre (theater), just because I happened to visit it earlier this year. If they think I'm going to hop on a plane to New York just to come and watch their 'Summer Youth Programs (Programmes)', then they are sadly mistaken!) Where was I before that long winded bracket started? Oh yes... No sooner had I left (the UK for my holiday in the Canaries (Tenerife to be precise), then BAM, the MorrisseysWorld blog suddenly reappeared with the following article -
'Our Mozzer pledges to return if Morrissey gives one of the following signs:' This was followed by a list of:
This BAM was then immediately followed by WHAM (No, not George and Andrew getting back together with Pepsi & Shirley)... a posting on my blog by Morrissey, which read:
This was then followed by CALAM (ITY). A TTY statement announcing that the South American tour was off because the promotors had no petrol money left (or something like that!) The TTY statement was actually entitled 'If I By Chance Your Eye Offend You', which I believe is a Houseman quote. The "Watch closely", "LooK" and 'Eye' references were all no doubt coincidental, and the fact that the TTY statement is dated July 19th makes it l'oo'k as though the comment on my blog came later, but it's all smoke and mirrors, I can confirm that the TTY statement DEFINITELY WASN'T THERE when the above was posted on my blog... or WAS it?
Despite Our Mozzer declaring that the MW site would "remain dead" unless one of the four listed things occurred, on Sunday 21st July, ANOTHER hugely amusing article appeared, entitled 'The Art Of Doing Nothing', and then yesterday, the piece considered by some to be Our Mozzer's finest hour was republished, 'A Brief Surrealist Essay on Emnity', along with a few other old favourites including 'Bans Committee'.
The new articles (and the old of course), really are very good, so are we to see more, or does one of the 4 in the list now have to happen first?
Whilst I idled my week away in the sun, I apparently missed a few sessions of Our Mozzer in the MW chat room, and although somebody has kindly published a couple of the things mentioned on my blog, I have no idea what else may have been said, so if you were there, please leave comment to let me know. From the comments that HAVE been left, it would appear the Our Mozzer started to answer the interview questions that members of the BRS posted months ago. Here are the questions and answers:
For years I was available.
And only a handful noticed.
There is so much more that I wanted to write today, but I have run out of time. I am off to play cricket, and tomorrow I am away watching cricket in a place called Hook. I have no time to mention Moz being photographed in an LA record shop, being spotted at a Savage concert, the Guardian writing Morrissey off YET AGAIN, Rustic Bland including a Moz song on Des Island Discs (well done Rustle for not choosing a cliche Smiths song) etc etc. I haven't even found time to break up my blog with some amusing photos, so I doubt anybody is still reading this far down the page, but what am I to do... my cricket team need me, so off I must trot.
Before I go, I MUST mention that Comrade Harps has written a hysterical parody piece entitled 'These Men Here'. Just as Morrissey the lyricist influenced many bands with his writing, his alter ego, 'Our Mozzer', is doing the same with his satirical writing. I hope we see more from Comrade Harps, his first piece really is very, very funny. Read here : http://seasoncreep.blogspot.com.au/p/thesemen-here-amorrissey-parody-piece.html
And finally for today, 'GirlWithout' has pointed out that the 'Still Whorin' Father' reference comes from a piece written on Solow on Boxing Day 2009 by Father Neil Horan. See if you recognise the writing style: http://www.morrissey-solo.com/threads/106182-Morrissey-has-Goose-for-Christmas.
*Goes off humming 'Baby' by Biebs*