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Tuesday, 18 March 2014

Day 916 - Putting the Boom-Boom In

I recently wrote that the dynamics of my blog have changed since I struck up, what I deludedly believe to be, a friendship with Morrissey, but I am not going to watch my p's and q's, I shall carry on writing in the same way that I always have, after all, this has always been my honest online diary, albeit that the vast majority of people who have stumbled across it, have dismissed it as the workings of a fantasising bullshitter, which if I'm honest, I wouldn't want any other way. That is too long for a first sentence isn't it? Too many commas again too. And now I've used the word too, too much. This is already shaping up to be a shit blog entry, my advice to my twelve regular readers is to bail out now. Leave. Just go. I won't be offended. I too wouldn't bother staying. Shit, another too. Aggggh! Why is it that some days, you start writing, and you keep using the same words or phrases? I had a bad case of the 'of course' the other day. Anyway, I have hopefully now seen everybody off, so I can get on with writing my fantasising bullshit. Eyes down, and look in for your first number this time..... it's a bingo phrase..... shall I bother writing today? Really?

As I was saying, well, writing actually, I am not going to watch my p's and q's, and if I therefore end up writing something that upsets the Mozziah to the extent that he banishes me to a further side of hell than Joyce and Weeks, then so be it. I have now reached a point where I am absolutely relaxed in Morrissey's company, and I no longer feel the need to try and impress him, or to say what I think he might want to hear. I have even taken the step of admitting that I am a Wham fan, which could have meant the end, but so far, our friendship has survived..... although I suppose a postcard addressed to my car windscreen wiper could be on it's way.


JOYCE, WEEKS, ROURKE, NIGEL DAVIS, PETRIDIS, ROBERT SMITH.... THEY ARE ALL IN HERE SOMEWHERE..... CLARISSA DICKSON WRIGHT JOINED THEM YESTERDAY..... I COULD BE NEXT

I shall keep my car locked in my garage, just in case.... and on the subject of keeping mine hidden, yesterday saw Morrissey return to the Twitterdilly Arms, as everybody's favourite pessoa, Fifi, and the topic of conversation turned to my infamous knee lunging antics of 2009 (See Day 33 of this blog), in which I attempted to stage invade during the song I Keep Mine Hidden. During our conversation, I mentioned how I had met the grandparents of Sabastian, the baby on the cover of YOR. Fifi quickly corrected me, and informed me that Charlie Browne's baby's name is actually "Sebastien with an E, it's spelled the French way." Silly me! *tuts to self* Fifi tried to find some Youtube footage of my famous 'knee lunge', but none has ever surfaced. The closest she could find was a bizarre clip, that has made it into our Twit Arms chart, although WHY anybody would take the time to upload such a clip, is beyond me.

Fifi has visited the Twit Arms for the past five days now, and the talk among the locals has been nothing more than idle chit chat. It would appear that Morrissey is feeling very relaxed, and is happy to be passing away these 'lull' days just talking about nothing with a few deluded fans. Perhaps he has been soothed by mixing with the donkeys at La Fabrique!




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DONKEYS!

It's not all idle chit chat though, there is plenty of piss taking as well, usually at my expense, but I don't mind, in fact, I like it. Anything to be the centre of attention!

Meanwhile Boz Boorer has announced that he is back in Britain, and this Saturday will be playing with the Polecats at The Islington in London. I did ask Moz if he would be going, but he replied, "no, I have a swimming lesson." I wonder if he'll be with his new mate, Cliff?



This blog entry really is going nowhere, so I think I will end it, and just publish the new Top 20. I suppose the main reason that I have written a blog entry at all today, is to keep on record that Morrissey is still actively integrating with us, while the whole world carries on ignoring him. Fifi has gained NO extra followers (still 55), so unless some journalist somewhere has been watching this whole phenomenal story, and finally decides to lift the lid, things will pretty much keep on as they are. The only journalist who has been watching everything, is Kevin Marrinan, but I still can't work out if he is in the know about MorrisseysWorld, or if he just doesn't think anybody will take him seriously if he were to write the story. Maybe he is worried that Morrissey will sue him, but surely there is more than enough evidence to prove everything.... or IS there? Actually, of course (shit, the of course is back) there isn't enough evidence, EVERYTHING  remains coincidence, which is why nobody new is joining us. I really can't wait for the new tour, because Morrissey really can do ANYTHING now, without anybody cottoning on. This can't last forever, but WHAT will finally expose us?

FIFI HIGHLIGHTS FROM THE TWIT ARMS:

"Sexual ambiguity has completely vanished. Nowadays if you're a girl, you twirk and if you are a man you flex your big muscles. The human brain must have shrunk in the last 30 years. I miss the good old days."

(Ed- Morrissey even has his own unique spelling of twerk.)











FIFI HIGHLIGHTS (CNTD)

"I'm not too sure about the "Marry Me" tattoo on my chest anymore. Youth mistake."


YOUTH MISTAKE

In response to my Wham confession:

"Rat created the Patel daisy society for George. He's leaving us."
"Following the Whammiah is a hit amongst pina colada lovers."
"Wham! definitely put the boom-boom into my heart." (Ed- Yes, I KNEW he was a fan!)

That will do for today. I still haven't managed to find out when Linder Sterling's birthday is. Will SOMEBODY please post it in the comments section. I am happy to take it from an anonymous. I have emailed the St Ives School of Painting, to ask them, so perhaps they'll reply.


SCHOOL OF PAINTING - PORTHMEORSTUDIOS - ST IVES CORNWALL

TWITTERDILLY ARMS TOP 20 - PRESENTED TODAY BY FLUFF RAT IN THE TWIT ARMS TO: Erica, Heather, Tracey, Fifi, Willow, Yunara, Bunny, MancLad and Old Willoughby.



1. ALL THE LAZY DYKES (LIVE IN DENMARK 2004) - MORRISSEY (RE-ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b16NdzpjdLI

Fresh ink: Monk showed off her fresh fake tattoos on Twitter last week ahead of Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras festivities
I DON'T THINK SOPHIE MONK ACTUALLY IS, BUT I LIKED THE BLUE ROSE







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THE BLUE ROSE SOCIETY VICE PRESIDENT, VULGAR ANGIE. SHE'S OURS!


2. WAKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO-GO (TOTP 1984) - WHAM! (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h75mqUm0lIo



3. HAND IN GLOVE (LIVE ON THE TUBE 1984) - THE SMITHS (RE-ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xik6LrUvygs




4. THE BIRTH OF THE SONG INITIALS BB - SERGE GAINSBOURG (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IO7Eq3b6t8E

5. BELLES, BELLES, BELLES - CLAUDE FRANÇOIS (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFxQ9sV0axc

6. CLUB TROPICANA - WHAM! (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYX0sjP6Za8




7. RATS - SYD BARRETT (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLqeuieaeAI

8. BREAKING THE RULES - LUDUS (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNQKQmXyyac




9. LES YEUX BLEUS - SACHA DISTEL (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYnXsjHrV8U&feature=youtu.be

10. HARLEY DAVIDSON - BRIGITTE BARDOT (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ai2As4XFZDY&feature=youtu.be







11. LIFEGUARD ON DUTY (VIVA HATE SESSIONS) - MORRISSEY (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3EGt-ETl4TU&feature=youtu.be

12. IRISH BLOOD, ENGLISH HEART (JOOLS HOLLAND 2004) - MORRISSEY (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJwsfbuPBm4&feature=youtu.be

13. THIS CHARMING MAN (LIVE IN GT YARMOUTH 2009) - MORRISSEY (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEX11INgMn0

14. I'M A MAN - JOBRIATH (DOWN 10):https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVTGcQX1Mi4

15. ONCE UPON A DREAM - BILLY FURY (RE-ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ae_ogriURVk

16. SHINE ON YOU CRAZY DIAMOND - PINK FLOYD (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klKCeFDnDiI

17. 1970 (LIVE AT GOOSE LAKE 1970) - THE STOOGES (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=U001Zh7YS98&app=desktop

18. SWAY - DEAN MARTIN (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsgcXZzu6io&feature=youtu.be

19. BACK HOME - THE ENGLAND WORLD CUP SQUAD 1970 (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLpyriMOttA

20. I KEEP MINE HIDDEN (LIVE IN GT YARMOUTH 2009) - MORRISSEY (NEW ENTRY): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBA5_enFaB8 (Possibly the best piece of video footage on Youtube!)

9 comments:

  1. ah whiskers, I had that 1970 world cup record, I also remember franny lee trying an overhead shot and saying he just saw the shadow of the ball coming..fantastic, cos I cant even remember last weeks city game.. age hey

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  2. We do forgive you for the Wham incident...

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  3. Not sure I want journalists or more fans to know- Fifi and company would surely flee.

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  4. It's a donkey and a pony.
    Tony doesn't like to be mistaken for a donkey.
    Eeyore

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  5. Too many photos of Wham on this blog. Those belong in your other blog.
    People here have good taste.
    Lord of the twirk (sic)

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  6. One of these fine days I will make it to the chart run down. Sorry I was unable to join you all again.

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  7. I am property of brs and belong to them and Moz

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  8. Good Morning Rat! Giving the Bingo's number, in Italy, is a metaphora for saying that spmeone is almost crazy, quite like you, my dear and I hope you'll never change! I'm not totally sure, but somewhere in the web, I read Linder is a Scorpio, so her birthday must be on late October or November, of course she's such a great artist and a beautiful woman and her age or zodiac sign are irrilevant. The school of painting looks great, for the first time in my life I desire to be a student! Wham? They are irrilevant to, but not totally, first because George's voice is beautiful and second, that's the power of pop music, a silly song could be strictly connected with special moments in personal life of a human beeing and so it could become a lovely song. Happy Birthday to Willow and a nice day to you and all the twelve who daily reading this blog, I know they are more than twelve! Ciao.

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  9. Are you stalking me again? How did you know I was thinking about Wham last weekend? It was the 'Wake me up' song. I'd just started celebrating Saint Urho Day (he drove the grasshoppers out of Finland) when it just popped into my head. I see this week you have Dean Martin on the list. He is a favorite of mine. Can you guess which song of his I am thinking about? Nice job once again on the chart.
    Fancy123

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