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Thursday, 15 May 2014

Day 974 - It's Official... I am two people and ratty rattles

Let the fun and frolics begin. Yesterday, at 7.47 pm UK time, Morrissey 'officially' joined twitter. After 5 years without a single tweet, the account '@ItsMorrissey' brushed off it's cobwebs, and sprung into life saying, "Hello. Testing, 1, 2, 3. Planet Earth, are you there? One can only hope...". As tweets go, it was hardly in the same league as anything that Our Mozzer has ever tweeted, but it sent the masses wild with excitement.


Despite having not tweeted for 5 years, the @ItsMorrissey account still had 77,800 followers attached to it, simply because it has the official twitter tick, and within half an hour of that first tweet, 700 more followers were added, which bearing in mind that Our Mozzer has posted 3,463 mesmerizing tweets and only has 645 followers is just ridiculously unbelievable.... although of course, it is NOT unbelievable, it is expected. We all KNEW it would happen this way. The masses are sheep, they only believe in officialdom.

That small blue twitter tick has more power than any word. Ed Miliband and David Cameron will have millions of people voting for them next year because they wear the badge of officialdom. If Ed Miliband were an independent candidate in you local constituency, he would lose his deposit money. He wouldn't hold the interest of three men and a dog in his local pub, and yet he will attract the vote of most of those earning less than £20,000 a year, whilst David Cameron will pull the vote of 'Middle Britain' and the rich elite, simply on the basis of his tie being blue, and each time you vote, you support this process.

The song World Peace Is None Of Your Business is as powerful a song as Meat Is Murder. I have been listening to it on repeat all day, and apart from the fact that the production of the song is stunning, the lyrics are as powerful as any lyric Morrissey has written EVER. I am already picturing a video being played whilst the song is sung on stage, with the video depicting people placing their vote into the ballot box, whilst politicians laugh, point and drink champagne. This song could become "The Times They Are a-Changin'" of the new millennium.

Within an hour of that first tweet by @ItsMorrissey, the follower numbers were up to 90,000, and by the time I went to bed at 10pm, they had reached 115,000, helped in no small measure by the fact that Russell Brand, with his 7.79 million followers, posted a tweet saying, "The real Morrissey, @itsmorrissey on twitter. If there is such a thing as real Morrissey or real twitter. Hash tag thereisalight."

Russell used the words, "The real Morrissey", which is what I have been calling him in this bliog for MONTHS, in fact, YEARS! Russell knows! But then again, we've always known that Russell knows.

I awoke this morning to find that @ItsMorrissey had posted a second tweet yesterday; three hours after the first one, it said, "Follow, follow, follow. Twitter is the perfect metaphor for...something. Dunno what." The follower numbers had also increased by 55,000 whilst I slept, and by 9am that figure had risen another 10,000 to 180,000. By 2.30pm, once the media had started reporting "Morrissey's first tweet", the followers were up to 219,000. The power of the tick. The power of the media.

The use of the word "Dunno" in the tweet immediately created a debate as to whether it was really Morrissey behind the account, with some saying, "Morrissey would never use the word "Dunno"", but when it was pointed out that Morrissey did use the word "dunno", in the lyrics of Still Ill, the "Morrissey would never" brigade rejoiced, and screamed, "It IS The Mozziah, it IS."

Morrissey himself has yet to make any sort of official comment as to whether he himself is behind this sparkly new twitter account, but according to a report on the Pitchfork website, "A rep has confirmed that it is indeed Morrissey Tweeting. Over on Morrissey's Facebook page, it says " Feel free to reach out." It also has a photo of Morrissey reaching out.

Somebody calling themselves 'Betty', left this comment on my blog last night regarding the 'reaching out' photo on Morrissey's Facebook account, "His official facebook account posted the link to the @itsmorrissey twitter account with a photo of Moz reaching for the hands of the audience and it says "feel free to reach out". Reminds me of that tweet from Fifi saying reach for the hand. I wonder if they're (harvest) doing that so we know moz knows about brs or if it's just coincidence?? "

Betty is of course correct about the Fifi tweet. On May 8, BEFORE official Moz mentioned "reach out", Fifi posted this:

The Fifi tweet gets added to the very long list of 'Coincidences' that have occurred on this whole phenomenal journey.

I have no idea if it is Morrissey himself using the @Itsmorrissey account, but there are two things that make me question that it may not actually be Moz; firstly, I sent a message to Banjaxer a couple of weeks ago saying that I wish somebody would get rid of the old @ItsMorrissey account, and secondly, in that second tweet of @Itsmorrissey, there is NO GAP after the three ...'s. Morrissey would NEVER not leave a gap.

Perhaps the 'official' Morrissey twitter account is a social experiment to see if people will believe anything they are told..... or perhaps, the account has risen from the flames to simply help sell records and merchandise!

And on that subject, yesterday I received an email from the marketing people, offering all sorts of wonderful packages for World Peace Is None of Your Business. I chose the 'Uber Deluxe Bundle' for £69.99 which includes; the vinyl LP with digital card, standard CD, album litho and lyrics, Deluxe Digital Album, T-shirt and a poster featuring your and other fan's names! The price rose to £75.69 by the time postage was added on, but I'd have happily paid £1000 for this bundle if it meant that Mozzer could maintain the lifestyle to which he has become accustomed. God only knows what name will go on the 'Fan Poster', because there was no option to choose a name. By purchasing this bundle, it also means I have purchased the song WPINOYB again, but if it helps Mozzer get into the chart, I would happily pay to download it another fifty times.

And on the subject of charts, TTY has posted an article showing the chart position across the world for WPINOYB based on first day sales:

First day sales chart positions for Morrissey's new single, WORLD PEACE IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

14 May 2014
First day sales for the single WORLD PEACE IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS show the following chart positions:
#5 Sweden
#6 Azerbaijan
#10 Ukraine
#11 Israel
#12 Romania
#18 Costa Rica
#20 Finland
#24 Greece
#38 England
#41 Ireland
#42 Norway
#44 Argentina
#44 Peru
#44 Spain
#47 Portugal
#48 Slovakia
#68 Denmark
#72 Luxembourg
#88 Russia
#99 Belgium

I cannot believe that I have gotten this far into today's blog entry without mentioning a far more important subject than an 'official' Morrissey twitter account, or new album bundle, and NO, I don't mean last night's concert in Albaqueque, I mean the visit yesterday to The Twitterdilly Arms of Our Mozzer. You can stuff your emperor's new coat, we've still got our comfy old slippers.
No wonder Moz chose Sweden for his book signing, they obviously have far more taste over there than anywhere else in the world.

Anyway, enough about chart positions, official twitter accounts, album bundles, WPINOFB being the strongest song Morrissey has ever written, Russell Brand and anything else that I may have written about already today, I have a FAR more important subject to write about, and NO, I don't mean Morrissey's concert in Albuquerque last night, I am referring to the visit yesterday of Our Mozzer to The Twitterdilly Arms. In fact there were a couple of visits, including one after the new official account had been launched.

All the BRS members piled into the World's Number 1 online Morrissey theme pub, and an impromptu party was thrown. Unfortunately, I was SO tired from having blogged all day, that I just couldn't muster the energy to join in, so I left. I fully expected Our Mozzer to have deleted his account by this morning, like he usually does, but he hasn't, it is still there, and from what I have read, I think that we may be in for some very exciting times now that there are TWO Morrisseys' in town. Here are Our Mozzer's highlights:


"hash tag worldpeaceisnoneofyourbusiness"

"I am not Morrissey, but I know a man who is." (Ed- A clue as to what was coming?)

"Did I ever say? Uncle Skinny is not welcome in MorrisseysWorld."

" is the second best blog on the web, after Ann Widdecomb's homepage."


"@Vulgar1mkela Angela. Thanks for the ring. Thanks for keeping me insane."
In response to Vulgar pointing out that @TheRatsBack should be thanked for buying the BRS ring, "His head's big enough without more praise from me. No, I'll thank you instead."

"@sorcha69 I like to think if Oscar Wilde was among us, mine is the only twitter account he'd be following."

"Shakespeare had his plays, Wilde had his witticisms and I have twitter."

"Wilde put the poetry in wit. Morrissey put the wit in poetry."

"This is the finest account on twitter, it's just that hardly anybody realises it."

"RIP Stephen Sutton. Hash tag dearhumansadlydeparted."

"Occasional alcohol makes one less anxious. A bit more makes one more interesting. Too much makes one utterly tedious to one and all."

"A broken heart visited upon a broken mind, and the outcome was love."


In response to @vulgar1mkela asking which account is the real one,"I have told you for three years I am not real. I am not worthy. Yet still I am the finest wit on twitter. It's Morrissey will clarify things, of course."

"@Jazissey @itsmorrissey The real Morrissey adores my tweets, Why else would I still be here?"

"When TRM and I chat on Twitter something strange will happen; a new twitter reality will be born."

If this actually happens, and 'Official' Morrissey and 'Parody' Morrissey converse on twitter, Morrissey will be creating something that NOBODY else has EVER done. It would be surreal. Nobody would of course believe that Prody Moz was the real Morrissey, but once the penny dropped..... WOW!

Alternatively, if Morrissey decides to simply fade out Parody Moz, and instead take Our Mozzer's twitter wit to the masses via @itsmorrissey, then he will become the most followed person on twitter. At this point people would surely link the wit to the old parody account, and the genius of the three year lead up to this point would come spilling out, in no short means thanks to FTM. People would be left dumbfounded by it all. It works for Morrissey either way; genius interaction with his parody self, or the modern day Wilde on twitter.

It may be that The Twit Arms has served as the equivalent of an old Working Men's Club, and we may have been the small audience, watching Morrissey cut his teeth on the Twit circuit, before he hits the big time. Some of the BRS may be horrified if we were to lose Our Mozzer, but it would be very selfish for us to keep him to ourselves. Personally, I feel it is time for the world to be treated to what we have had, and I would be excited by whatever way Morrissey decides to play it. But will M want to play it, or is he happy to keep Parody Moz under the radar? Time, as ever..... back to those highlights:

"Stupidity sells and intelligence repels. Except in Morrissey's World."

"@MOZKIDKYLE BlueRoseSociety President, we salute you. You and Devan had more guts than most grown ups. You delivered roses."

"@MOZKIDKYLE @itsmorrissey I have drawn Morrissey on to the twittersphere. He will surely follow me? Will he? Won't he?"

"I am merely a cyber-figment of everybody's imagination."

"I'm quite witty for a hairy-backed lollipop lady from Salford."


@Heathercat222 posted this observational tweet, which Our Mozzer retweeted, "@MorrisseyParody So you're responsible for his arrival on twitter, something that people said he would never do?"

"I suppose now people will debate the proofs that @itsmorrissey isn't Moz. Perhaps he will tweet during the encore?"

"Sorry, but the real Morrissey just isn't Morrisseyesque enough for me @itsmorrissey."

"@MadAlix14 @itsmorrissey Who does he think he is? I've been pretending to be the b*****d for 3 years on twitter - this is my turf. If the real Morrissey thinks he can steal my thunder, he can f*** off."

"The drip, drip, drip of the media cycle. The same stories on half-hourly repeat. Man in suit. Younger woman with expensive perm."

"If Morrissey posts a selfie with a BlueRose it's all over."


"Will @itsmorrissey's first retweet be one of mine? Is it unbecoming for the parody to fall in love with the subject of the parody?"

"Log Lady did tell you he'd be joining twitter. Don't you remember?"

"On twitter, wit, flair, intrigue and genius are eclipsed by a small blue tick."

"@theratsback will be spitting his coffee over the screen. When he logs back on... there are two MORRISSEY'S now! He'll need a new blog --" (Ed - note the gap after the three ...s? I told you!)

"If @itsmorrissey asks me to close my account, I will - instantly. But he won't; he adores me."

"A small prediction: I'll have more followers soon."

"With the real Morrissey on Twitter @itsmorrissey perhaps I should leave. After all, why would you drink Lambrini when there's Champagne?"

Our Mozzer retweeted @MadAlix14's tweet which said, "It all becomes more Lynchian by the hour!"

And it's true, it is becoming more Lynchian by the hour! The MorrisseysWorld blog heavily featured David Lynch's Twin Peaks, including introducing Log Lady to MorrisseysWorld, and also creating a Black Lodge, and now the real Morrissey has released a Lynch like promo film for WPINOYB, and now he's created TWO Morrissey's on twitter! Well, actually there are MORE than two, but that's another story.


"The only unpardonable sin in art is frankness."

In response to @PapaSonsFilm's question, "How many followers do you think the official Morrissey will get by June?" "2 million. But perhaps it's all a ploy to bring @Morrisseyparody to the masses?"

Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

So, we wait and see what develops now. It is exciting times.

It has taken me so long to write today's blog, that thankfully, some concert footage and photos have emerged from last night's concert at the Sunshine Theatre in Albuquerque. I have no idea on the setlist, but the footage looks superb. There is also, AT LAST,  some footage of Kristeen Young, and watching/listening to her sing the new album songs live has actually brought tears to my eyes. The Knife Shift has not been taken out of the CD player in my car since it arrived. It is one of THE best albums I have ever bought. If I'm honest, I am shocked at just how much I like this album, and I cannot wait to see the songs live, although WHEN this will happen, God only knows.

"There are times in life when it pays to have a sense of humour." HIG:

Happen & Asleep:


Pearl of a Girl (with technical hitch) "I love you. You're the only one I love. Again.":

In other news, Mademoiselle Fifi dragged me into the toilets of The Arms yesterday, and whispered in my ear, "Surprised you haven't mentioned I'm not a man and Istanbul yet. No one's mentioned them actually. Surely I am not the only one who knows?"

Aghhhhhh! What does Fifi mean? What have we missed?

Astraea has also paid a couple of visits to The Arms in the past two days, leaving a couple of Nico posts, including her looking (and sounding) amazing in the Warhol film I, a Man:

A clip of Morrissey singing Swinging on a Star has also appeared on Youtube this morning. I am presuming it is from 2009, when Moz often sang this song. I have not seen a clip of it before, and I missed it being sung in Gt Yarmouth in 2009 because I had already left the concert..... not by choice!

STOP PRESS: I have just dragged Fifi into the loos of The Twit Arms, and have slapped her with a wet plimsoll, to get her to talk..... and it worked. She was referring to the editors notes on iTunes, released to them by Harvest, and she is right, NOBODY has picked up on what is written there about Istanbul and I'm not a Man. Here is what it says:

"Morrissey's razor-sharp wit and lofting melodies have shaped one of the most distinctive careers in rock, but World Peace Is None of Your Business shows the pop icon isn't content to rest on his laurels - the follow-up to 2009's Years of Refusal combines ratty WHOAH WHOAH WHOAH.... "RATTY???!!!! Oh, Fifi, you beauty. I shall carry on.... ratty electric guitars and forceful hooks in one of his most exploratory, gritty solo albums. The lyrics bear the singer's biting and brilliant signature: within the first three tracks he rattles WHOAH WHOAH WHOAH... FUCKING RATTLES???!!! WHEN HAS MOZ "RATTLED"? It's another rat reference! Where was I?...... rattles off a list of countries in political turmoil, makes waggish rhymes about infectious diseases and sings a first-person account of an abusive husband called "I'm Not a Man". But the big production of Joe Chiccarelli and the incendiary fury of guitarist Boz Boorer give World Peace... a treacherous, spine-tingling vigour. Among the many highlights are "Istanbul", an uptempo rocker set on the streets of the Turkish metropolis and jubilant melody of "The Bullfighter Dies".

That's enough from this Rat for today. All this blogging is exhausting me. There is no concert tonight, and Fifi has apparently gone back to bed, so The Arms should be quiet tonight. And on Friday, Vulgar Angie will offer Moz a single Blue Rose in Utah, and hopefully present him with the BLUE ROSE SOCIETY t-shirt.

I shall leave you with this, @itsmorrissey now has over 226,000 followers, so it is pointless any of the BRS bothering to tweet him, he will not see your tweet. That account is NOT Our Mozzer, for now it is corporate Mozzer, but keep 'em peeled.

@mikejoycedrums currently has 15,900 followers. How long before he asks for 25% of @itsmorrissey's followers?




10. GIVE
11. MEAT


  1. Nice blog as always ratty I think the official Morrissey one is purely for commercial reasons and promotion it had the desired effect twitter went mental around the world and that can only be a good thing for the masses. I'll stick with our Moz x

  2. Pics from last night usual place

  3. Sheep lol
    But will @itsmorrissey follow any of the blue roses

    1. Lol. I wonder how many of them will have the audacity to ask for a 'wristband'

  4. The number of followers of itsmorrissey do not shock me at all I think it's a shame that how things work

    I makes me sad that my Sarah is a sheep and how excited she was when Julie H retweeted the itsmorrissey first tweet now she's on the wagon with everyone else

    Tomorrow I will be hanging around the venue entrance door with two single roses

    1. And shirt in hand

      I will take picture and videos
      I do hope he does take them this time and doesn't tease like in Santa Ana

      All eyes on Salt Lake City Utah tomorrow

    2. here's hoping he isn't a naughty tease x

  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

  6. lynch knows x

  7. @MorrisseyParody tweeted to Lizzycat a couple of days ago that he would always be around "hidden in plain view". I think that says a lot.

    1. No. That was a Brummiesque anonymous message poster on Rat's blog. So it says nothing.

    2. GOB, as you have not apologised for the MANY things you did to me, don't feel as though you can post here as though you are my best mate. Either apologise or go away.

    3. The apology is there, if you are open to it. It's in the behavior. I think it would be more sophisticated to meet her act half way rather than just block. Meet intention with intention. We are all here to learn. You too.

      Archie Silver

    4. Dear Archie, I am always open. I await.

    5. I'm waiting with baited breath for Sabine's apology, because I have no clue what you expect her to apologise for. I must have missed something.

    6. Where do I start? GOB maliciously revealed my identity on twitter, knowing full well that I have purposely never revealed my identity; as I am the Banksy of the 'Mozziah following world', and she then aimed a torrent of abuse at me. A simple "I am sorry" will suffice, it is not much to ask, but I am not expecting one, and I doubt Joyce will ever have the foresight to apologise for his actions either. People are the same everywhere.

      Rat 16.5.14

    7. you won't get an apology from sabine. She's an unpleasant individual. She acts like she does, very cheap and tawdry, and then just does it again when she feels like it. She doesn't feel guilt or remorse.

      Lizzy has supported her every step of the way. In fact they're as bad as each other. Both are immature and morally defunct.

  8. Hello Ratty the fun it's just begun....I'm at swimming pool and I hope to find the time for listening the beautiful footage you posted andI'm curious about the Nico's video because there are words in my language: I wish I could stand up! Ciao, Romina with daughtdaughter's mobile.

  9. Oh Rats, that was some mental evening in the Arms, never seen the likes of it. Willow played a stormer bringing in the supplies. Perhaps, in the words of the great BB King "The thrill is gone", let's hope not. Perhaps it will get even madder. Let's hope so.

  10. NOBODY had picked up on the editors’ notes on iTunes?? You must have missed my tweet on that.

    Also found from the press release for WPINOYB “Morrissey is one of few iconic musicians making radical, counter-cultural work, and Harvest Records is proud to release his latest album on July 15th, 2014. World Peace Is None Of Your Business explores the tragedy of human apathy in our turbulent, modern era. Morrissey's career as a writer reaches new lyrical heights but maintains his signature humor, drama, and emotional longing. World Peace Is None Of Your Business was produced by Joe Chiccarelli at La Fabrique Studios in Saint-Rémy-de-Provence, France.

    The video for "World Peace Is None Of Your Business" is the first in a series of spoken-word performances directed by Natalie Johns and filmed at the legendary Capitol Studios. The short film features a cameo by Nancy Sinatra and is streaming at iTunes.”


    1. Great find. Exciting.

    2. i noticed detective GWO, you and heather put sergeant whiskers to shame

  11. Let the fun begin indeed! Although it appears that the main purpose of the new twit account is to market the album (as the latest tweet today made very clear), there does seem to be a plan in the works related to MW, and I'm very eager to see how that will unfold. The power of the blue tick and the media is astounding - it's been very entertaining to watch the masses flock to the new account, despite the un-Morrisseyesque tweets. I had noticed the 'ratty' mention and assumed it was a genuine coincidence. How silly of me, that never happens around here :)

  12. I don't think I have ever heard the word "ratty" to describe the sound of electric guitars. I looked up the definition of ratty:

    1.full of rats.
    2. of or characteristic of a rat. .
    3. wretched; shabby: a ratty, old overcoat.
    4. Slang. irritable or angry; bad-tempered; nasty: I always feel ratty when I wake up.

    I didn't know "ratty" was slang for irritable, angry, bad tempered or nasty. I just thought it was the author of FTM's nickname.
    Kudos Ratty!! You are "Almost Famous". And yes, I always feel ratty when I wake up.


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