"We've taken over @itsmorrissey to protect it from interlopers. Alas, it's already time to bid farewell to the account."
I believe that the outside world was very, very close to having the real Morrissey on twitter; and I have no doubt that he would have taken the twitter world by storm, but at the last minute, there was a change of heart. Morrissey would have thought it through long and hard, and come to the conclusion that @itsmorrissey just wouldn't have given him the same sort of interaction on twitter that Parody Moz has given him. Morrissey would also have worked out that if he had started tweeting to the masses, he would have received interaction of two sorts, A) Mass fawning..... "Morrissey, you saved my life, I love you SO much", and B) Mass stupidity.... "Hey Morrissy (sic), I'm eating a huge burger. Shall I save some 4 U? Lol : )". Ultimately, despite his HUGE global success, Morrissey is NOT a celebrity, he remains an outsider, and he has found his true home in The Twitterdilly Arms.
(L TO R): FIFI, OUR MOZZER AND MORRISSEY IN THE TWITTERDILLY ARMS.... WHICH IS ONLY AS IT SHOULD BE
A very good point has been made by Morrissey through this whole @itsmorrissey twitter 'thing' though; he has proven once again, that people really are sheep (no offence to sheep), and they will believe anything they are told if it has an official stamp, or even a semi-official stamp of authority attached to it.
Let me take our old friend @RosyMires as the perfect case point. Rosy has followed the whole MorrisseysWorld story from the very start, and came to the conclusion back in early 2012 that MW definitely wasn't Morrissey because: A) MW made fun of Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross, and B) MW showed no sympathy following the death of Whitney Houston. Rosy declared, "Morrissey just wouldn't do that", and despite ALL the evidence since; which has proven beyond all reasonable doubt that Morrissey is behind MW, Rosy simply refuses to accept it because there has been no 'official' word from Morrissey; and yet as soon as a twitter account appears with a little blue tick next to it, Rosy accepts this to be true, especially as a 'rep' (with no name) confirmed it was true via the website Pitchfork:
Following the announcement that Morrissey isn't behind the @itsmorrissey account after all, Rosy is now starting to ask questions!
Will Rosy, at last be able to see that not everything is all it would seem to be in Morrissey's world? And if Rosy starts to ask questions, will others also ask questions? Surely people must be able to see that none of the explanations being released by Harvest and 'Official Moz ring true? SURELY? Time, as ever....
One person who wasn't fooled by the official blue tick was @knitnurse, aka Helen Bridgwood; the wife of former Moz guitarist Jonny Bridgwood. Helen tweeted to say, "I was very surprised when everyone thought it was him." But after that tweet, it all went downhill for Helen, who followed it up with, "From what I can remember, I think he was a bit of a technophobe." And Helen continued, "He usually uses capitals." EVERYBODY KNOWS WHAT MORRISSEY DOES OR DOESN'T DO, and if your husband was once in Morrissey's band four hundred and three years ago, you even become an authority on such things! *shakes head.... which thankfully is still in place after yesterday*
Meanwhile, following the death of @itsmorrissey, FTM has regained it's memory, and the old blog postings are back in situ.... although not ALL of them; Day 898 DEFINITELY remains under lock and key. My blog entries returned after I was instructed to by Our Mozzer earlier this morning:
There is further good news, in that not only have we not lost Our Mozzer to the masses, but following the demise of @itsmorrissey, Mademoiselle Fifi has also returned to The Arms, and yesterday came in bearing a gift of Alain Delon for Astraea:
Astraea thanked Mme Fifi for the gift of the song, saying, "Merci, pussycat! You are ALWAYS a girl after my own heart. Verrry Amalfi-Coast-meets-Alain-in-the-south-of-France, n'est ce pas? And toward the end, he huskily whisper-sings... 'if you didn't exist already, I would have invented you... ' Oh la la,.... ALAIN! And the only thing better in life than Alain being husky, would be Alain being husky next to me, in a Primrose yellow, convertible E-type. In 1967. In Biarritz."
Fifi also pulled me into the toilets of The Arms, and whispered a sweet nothing in my ear. The sweet nothing made me smile, but I cannot say any more until the sweet nothing becomes a sweet something.
I haven'tt yet mentioned the small matter of last night's concert in Denver. Unfortunately, just as with the previous night in Utah, not much video has emerged, in fact so far, just Hand in Glove. Rumour has it that Moz tripped up during the encore:
Thankfully, the Blue Rose Society Vice President, Vulgar Angie has posted her videos from Utah, including a mesmerizing version of Trouble Loves Me..... it is ALWAYS mesmerising! ALL of the other songs Angie has recorded are also mesmerizing. I LOVE Bullfighter SO much, and have been mic whipping in the garden this morning. Not real mic whipping you understand, air mic whipping, which is far more skilful than air guitar playing.
There has been a rather interesting write-up of the Salt Lake City concert posted on Solow by somebody calling themselves 'Old Mathew'. I wouldn't usually mention that place, but the write-up is worthy of a greater audience. It is very interesting to note that Old Mathew mentions The Bullfighter Dies, adding, "I'm a sucker for a 2 minute pop song', which is something I wrote about the same song, just the other day! Old Mathew also has GREAT recollection, remembering not only the setlist, but also ALL of Morrissey's 'speaky bits' WORD FOR WORD! Old Mathew also takes the time to mention Vulgar Angie's blue rose, letting us know that Moz ignored it, adding, "I've never made head or tails of that insane inanity". Nope, Mathew, me neither.... but we wouldn't change him for the world! There is something rather familiar about Old Mathew. Hmm:
2:11 am (Utah time): A great show. Same setlist as ABQ except he actually did drop NFD this time. So:
Hand In Glove / Speedway / Ganglord / I Have Forgiven Jesus / I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris / World Peace Is None Of Your Business / Yes, I Am Blind / Life Is A Pigsty / The Bullfighter Dies / To Give (The Reason I Live) / Meat Is Murder / Everyday Is Like Sunday / Earth Is The Loneliest Planet / Trouble Loves Me / I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday // Asleep / One Day Goodbye Will Be Farewell
A good rush and a push toward the stage during One Day, with at least two people out of a half dozen making it on stage. More tomorrow. Just got back from a four hour drive home....
2:53 am (Utah time): Ok, a few more observations. I always need an hour or so to settle down before sleeping after a long drive, even if it is nearly 3 am in the hither most regions of Utah...
When he came out on stage he said, "Today is Julia's birthday, and everybody's happy."
At one point he quipped, "I come from the land of carbon monoxide. So the clear air here is [wearing me down or something similar, referring to the altitude]." He did seem slightly tired.
Before World Peace he said [paraphrasing], "Today I made a terrible mistake. I turned on the television. And the first thing I saw was an advertisement for guns and ammo. Which you would never see on British telly. The only people who own guns there are the Royal family. Barbarians, barbarians, barbarians. But then I remembered: World peace is none of your business."
He returned to the theme of watching TV in SLC before Meat is Murder. "They'd advertise meat. Then the cancer care center. Then meat. Then the cancer care center. Again and again and again [making a circular motion with his hand]. Does nobody make the connection?"
Highlights were World Peace (Jesse's solo was great), Life is a Pigsty (amazing), The Bullfighter Dies (I'm a sucker for a 2 minute pop song anyways), and Trouble Loves Me (when he gestures to the audience on the line "at your age!"). And of course Asleep.
SLC tends to be a bit muted, so the sudden explosion of ambitious stage divers during One Day was a pleasant and welcome surprise.
I've seen the man on every tour since 1991. I damn well hope there are more to come. Now I'm wishing I had booked that flight to Denver for tomorrow night….
2:59 am (Utah time): Oh, and for what it's worth, he determinedly ignored the blue rose that was held out to him, and seemed to scowl at its presentation. I've never made heads or tails of that insane inanity, but it's clear he seems annoyed by it as well (and is aware what it means).
ANGIE'S BLUE ROSE OF UTAH, WHICH DIDN'T MAKE IT TO MOZ
OLD MATHEW REVIEW CONTINUED:
Watching Life is a Pigsty -- my God that man can sing.
3:18 am (Utah time): I really shouldn't have drank that Red Bull during the last hour of the drive, though I suppose this beats waking up ensconced on a Prickly Pear cactus beside a rolled-over truck…
A final thought, and plea (for the day, there will be more pleas and perhaps even thoughts tomorrow):
I loved how he came over to shake my hand during Everyday (just after the "greased tea with me" line), and that it was caught on video… that said, I am still waiting for one of you to cough up the video of me dancing with him during King Leer at Jones Beach, 1991. Anyone, anyone? I know it exists. Or Great Woods, Mansfield, MA, 1991, during "Suedehead?" Come on, come on….
Old Mathew's comments are followed on Solow with this from Anonymous:
"Official Statement: This is NOT Old Mathew. I would like to stress that I do not drink Red Bull. I gather that someone is commenting in my name that I drank Red Bull - bit that is NOT Old Mathew. Please be aware that he is bogus. That's, of course, if you should remotely care.
Salt Lake City
17 May 2014
Somebody calling themselves 'Blue Rose' on Solow, then left this comment: "This is all part of the journey. if he accepts it all of the time, it would not be the same! Read Following the Mozziah; you will see!" (Ed- For the record, 'Blue Rose' isn't me.)
Uncle Skinny then threw in his view: "Just fuck off, you tiresome cunt."
Another of the spoken word promo videos has also been released onto Youtube, and this time it is The Bullfighter Dies; which is a bit of a surprise because we were expecting the next two singles to be Istanbul and Earth is the Loneliest Planet. Has there been a change of plan? I would LOVE Bullfighter to be released.
Has anybody yet managed to work out what is being sung at the end of WPINOYB? Is it a foreign tongue, or a record playing backwards?
That will do for today. @itsmorrissey is dead, but could it be that an official MorrisseysWorld is still on it's way? @MorrisseyWorld has tweeted to say, "The wait is almost over". Is Banjaxer involved? I have to say, when I first read that "Dunno" tweet from @itsmorrissey, I immediately thought it had Banjaxer's handwriting all over it!
There is no concert tonight, and tomorrow night it will be the Rococo Theatre in Lincoln Nebraska. It will also be Boz Boorer's birthday.
*Goes off singing* All in all, imagine this: Nobody loves us, Dab-hands at trouble, with four days of stubble, we are....