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Thursday, 11 September 2014

Day 1092 - Fresh as new pants (Unpublished)

My deletion of a whole chapter of my blog has caused a bit of confusion in the ranks, although Marcus Markou has declared it an act of genius. He left this comment on yesterday's 'official' blog entry:

"As far as I am aware, this is the first time a blog has used the 'Pam Ewing Wakes Up to find the Last Season's Episodes Were a Dream' device in a blog. A stroke of genius?"

I too had thought of the Dallas 'dream series' as I was deleting the posts of the past 46 days. Actually, deleting is the wrong word, for they all still exist; they are just locked away in a cupboard, away from prying eyes.

Of course, what they didn't do with Dallas, was continue the story line of the 'dream series', which I am doing here on my 'unpublished blog entries'..... or maybe they did secretly continue the 'dream series' storyline prior to Bobby Ewing returning, and just like my 'unpublished blog entries', those episodes (which now must run into the hundreds) have never been released to the television watching public. Genius! How does one get to see them?

Anyway, back to 'Following of the Mozziah (Unpublished)'.

Kerry (@AmIMoving2Fast) has joined Moz Fiend in issuing an unreserved apology via DM for stabbing me in the back, and I have magnanimously accepted. I am far too nice.

All was fairly quiet on the Moz front yesterday, although Morrissey, as Alf's Button, did pop into my DM box in the evening. I can no longer call the DM box the toilets of The Twitterdilly Arms, as officially Morrissey isn't on twitter.... not that he ever was, but you know what I mean! Who am I talking to? It is only me here. These words of mine are now just a personal diary, although I have a suspicion that one day these words will be read.

Here are the highlights of our conversation:

ME: My blog was nothing until you came along. Some might say you've made it what it is.
I have been reading through your tweets. I think it best that I don't interact with you on this account. I muddy the waters. My mere presence confuses everybody. They all end up accusing you of being I and visa versa. I shall quietly observe.

MOZ; Yes, possibly for the best. Otherwise it will all be broken in two. I am quietly observing tonight as well. A test to see if anyone pines for me. Tell me Rat, do you like Ray Charles?

ME: Yes. Why?

MOZ: Ray Charles speaks to me today.

ME: Which is your favourite?

MOZ: It is Georgia on my mind. I have had far too much gin tonight. My head is spinning. You currently have the attention of a drunk Morrissey.

(It has occurred to me this morning that Morrissey was giving me a clue, and that he is going to announce that he is playing a concert in GEORGIA. I have posted the song on twitter this morning, with the wording: *Penny drops* GEORGIA on my mind. If Moz does announce a concert in Georgia, people will wonder what I knew. I've probably got this wrong, as I often do. I expect Morrissey just likes the song! Back to yesterday's conversation. Let me get out of these brackets, and into something a little more comfortable.)

ME: Mother's ruin. I don't believe I have EVER tried gin.

MOZ: You must start you tart.

ME: I am not a tart.... these days!

MOZ: Rat, you are always a tart. Tell me. What is the point of this. I mean really. I could announce a new date on the tour right now and then it could become reality in a week but still people wouldn't understand.

ME: Is there a new date then?

MOZ: There will be. Where would you like it to be?

ME: Please don't over stretch yourself.

MOZ: Rat, After the illness of last week I feel fresh as new pants.

ME: Portsmouth.

MOZ: Ha. Is Portsmouth a reference to a tweet I made a while ago?

ME: You tweeted about Portsmouth?

MOZ: Indeed I did. An age ago. As that OTHER account. Also I believe a record deal could be close.

ME: A record deal??? Are they mad?

MOZ: They clearly are.

ME: My blog hits from France have increased.

MOZ: Well... I did tell you didn't I? Did I not tell you I was in France?

ME: North or South?

MOZ: Now that WOULD be telling. I would also expect hits from Poland this week (next 7 days) as well.

ME: Quite the flaneur.

MOZ: Exactly. I cannot rest. My affection for Broken grows by the day.

ME: You want relations with Broken?

MOZ: Rat, Are you fine? Everyday you say.. Oh I cannot be bothered.

ME: Fine & dandy thanks. You?

MOZ: Just wanted to make sure you had not developed the urge to throw yourself over a cliff.

ME: The cliffs are safe. And now, gin free, I must sleep. Goodnight flan face.

MOZ: Goodnight Baldy.

AlfsButton did make a very brief appearance on twitter to announce he was drunk, but soon disappeared.

So, that's it from the blog that is now underground. I must now go and write the 'published' blog, which amounts to an interview with Gustavo.

*Goes off singing to self* Just an old, sweet song keeps Georgia on my mind.


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