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Sunday, 28 September 2014

Day 1109 - Alf Returns (Unpublished)

Here we go again! AlfsButton has decided to continue frequenting the Twitterdilly Arms, and as OM won't let me mention him on my blog, I am having to go back underground to report his words. Today's 'published' FTM contains information about MorrisseysWorld, whilst this 'unpublished' version reports the happenings of Morrissey as AlfsButton.

Here are today's offerings from the filthy toilets of The Arms:

ME: It looks like I will once again have to take my blog underground.

MOZ: I understand. Yes, blog from the underground. An English Dostoevsky. I am slightly worried you didn't notice the parody of the parody I was doing.

ME: Was that @MorrisseyParody?

MOZ: I couldn't possibly say.

ME: B******! I presumed you'd told Banjaxer to pretend to be you with that account.

MOZ: I still won't say. Missed me?

ME: Have you been away?

MOZ: The communication between us has been dire. Perhaps it is me that has missed you. Now do not tell anyone I said that! Public image and all that old boy.

ME: Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. Good to have you back in the box.

MOZ: I cannot be confined/defined.


For the record, here are Morrissey's last words left in my DM box before he disappeared on the 22nd:

"Rat, have you ever thought about publishing a book? One day you WILL write this story as a book. You've done the work already."

I will take that as his blessing to do so, but as to whether it will actually happen, WHO knows?

AlfsButton has also made a few appearances in the public bar of The Arms, but there is nothing relevant to report. His only quote of note being: "I have no time for morals", followed by, "I'm hardly Jim McDonald", which tends to suggest Morrissey is keeping up with local events in Coronation Street.

JIM MCDONALD (LEFT) IN LAST WEEK'S EPISODE OF CORRIE (WHY AM I BOTHERING TO POST PHOTOS ON A BLOG POST THAT WILL NEVER BE PUBLISHED? AND WHY AM I NOW ASKING QUESTIONS, WHEN NOBODY WILL READ THEM? I THINK I AM GOING SLIGHTLY MAD.)

*Eventually published Nov 9th 2015

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