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Thursday, 4 August 2016

Day 1885 - Bergen bound

I have just returned from a mini cricket tour of East Sussex, and tomorrow will be heading to Bergen to watch Morrissey on Saturday. I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it, I'm about to lose control, and I think I like it... although there is but one concern, Morrissey's health. More about that later.

Morrissey's crew and various band members have tweeted during the past few days to say they are already in Bergen, and Moz himself has been spotted there.

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MORRISSEY IN BERGEN WITH KEVIN 'TOWEL WAFTER' PHILLIPS 

Whilst I was away playing with my length of willow, one of the members of the BRS, Chuck the mechanical orange, decided to delete her Twitter accounts and walk away. As she left, Chuck confessed that despite many, many, many denials, the Blue Rose Society tumblr account HAD been her doing after all, and informed us that she would no longer be updating it. I have no idea why Chuck has decided to leave, but I hope she reconsiders as she has been an integral part of the BRS. In case Chuck has forgotten exactly what she and the rest of us are are involved in, here is 'Our Graham' with a reminder:

MORRISSEY IS SECRETLY AMONG US (IN FULL VIEW), HAS FORMED A SOCIETY THAT MIRRORS OSCAR WILDE'S GREEN CARNATION, AND WE FEW ARE PART OF IT. THIS IS HISTORY IN THE MAKING AND WE ARE THE LUCKIEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD.  I dearly hope that Chuck doesn't become another Rosy Mires, and that she also keeps updating the BRS tumblr site; which is both beautiful and good... who cares about the truth!

There has been no further sign of Broken in the past few days, but Our Mozzer has made the odd appearance in The Wrong Arms. On Sunday he rather worryingly tweeted, "If this illness does not leave my body I will just have to cancel all the upcoming appearances." There was further concern for Mozzer's health when on Monday afternoon OM played the song Cemetry Gates on the jukebox.... or perhaps it was merely a clue to the upcoming set list, but I don't think so.

MORRISSEY AT OSCAR WILDE'S GRAVE IN PARIS

OM returned again to The Arms just after midnight on Monday night and interacted with a few BRS members. MerryAnne asked OM his thoughts on Jamie Oliver announcing that he wants to be cremated in a pizza oven when he dies, to which she got the reply, "Let the animals he so wilfully slaughters massacre him. Now. Let's not wait."


OM latched onto a Twitter hashtag entitled 'Why I can't leave Twitter', tweeting, "It is the place I come to where I know I'll be the smartest person there. Well compared with my 283 followers that is". Jesse Moz Fiend responded to this with, "I'm happy to see your ego is healthy", to which OM replied, "It's about the only thing that is."

Hopefully these mentions of ill health are nothing too serious. If Morrissey does have any genuine health concerns, he mustn't push himself. Concerts and tours can always be rearranged. Health ALWAYS has to come first.

The mysterious white haired lighthouse keeper, Dawn Mist, also responded to OM's tweet about him being smarter than his twitter followers by bizarrely asking, "Have there been "Slippery Forces" at work again?", to which OM replied, "Is that a reference to Boz's next album? The cheek of him asking me to do backing vocals. The desperation as I accepted."

Could it really be true that Morrissey has added some backing vocals to Boz's next LP? I guess we will find out on September 23rd, when Age of Boom is released. BB has announced that the album features the likes of Eddie Argos, Georgina Baillie and Morrissey's old mucker, James Maker, but there has been no official mention of any Morrissey backing vocals.

ADAM ANT BACKING SINGER, GEORGINA BAILLIE (THE SUBJECT MATTER OF BRAND & ROSS'S 'SACHSGATE'), FEATURES ON BOZ BOORER'S NEW LP, AGE OF BOOM

And finally, despite ignoring the BRS interview questions, Morrissey has given an interview to some Australian rag. In the interview Mozzer is asked about a record deal, but brushes over it. Could we get an announcement soon, and will we have any new songs on the tour?

Right then, off to Bergen. Blue roses packed. Mozziah t-shirt packed. TOOTHBRUSH packed. Have I mentioned... I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it. I have just one dilemma - how do I get a blue rose to Morrissey from row Z? Hmm...


PHOTO @JAYJ_CASA

NB - I am not taking a laptop to Bergen, so there will be no updates until my return... if I do return.

9.20PM - STOP PRESS: Our Mozzer has popped into The Arms this evening and tweeted, "What does it mean?" Could it be that Moz has returned from rehearsals and still has Art-hounds running around his head? Oh, I DO hope I get to see/hear it on Saturday night - the only time it has ever been sung live was 5 years ago in London.



9.50PM - ANOTHER STOP PRESS: Broken has popped into The Arms to state, "Due to dullness of interactions and depressing nature of tweets on timeline OM has called it a day. Blame yourselves. And each other. Cunts."

And there we have it.

5.30AM THE NEXT DAY - YET ANOTHER STOP PRESS: Despite Broken's claim that OM had decided to call it a day, OM popped, no, not popped, I always write popped... er, OM reappeared, no, that makes him sound like a magician's assistant, er, oh fuck it, it's too early to try and think of words... OM returned to The Wrong Arms at 10.30 last night and tweeted, "London is full of art hounds these days. It depresses me even from another country."

I am presuming OM's comment was in relation to YET ANOTHER Guardian journalist writing lies about him; this time, a nonentity called Hadley Freeman, who yesterday jumped onto the racism bandwagon by calling Morrissey a racist because he dared to criticise the new darling of the 'London Left', Mayor Sadiq Khan. According to Freeman, Morrissey is racist for saying in his recent interview with Australia's News.Com, that Khan eats Halal meat. Am I a racist for eating Weetabix? Does the Guardian not have an editor these days, who could stop such poor, poor journalistic comment? Oh, it's Katherine Viner. Enough said.

OM added these additional comments in conversation with MerryAnne, who was equally bemused by Freeman's piece:
"Talking about the Holocaust does not make someone Hitler."
"Wait until the Chinese are apparently called a subspecies.. Oh wait."

Incidentally, OM is now just following 1 person on Twitter, Dawn Mist.

Right then, time to head to Gatwick.


15 comments:

  1. what do you mean no laptop any decent hotel has these in the business centre, please tell me that you're not staying in the local youth hostel, oh I shiver at the thought, these days if I am booked in to anything less than four stars I am out of there in a shot, I also the latest statement has put SO LOW in to a spin, loving the Nigel Farage bit, reminds me so much of the MW blog

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  2. forgot to say have a great time, but be careful, fake roses for Moz might not go down too well

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  3. Enjoy your time in Bergen, Ratty. Yes, health always should come first, so here's hoping that Moz is well on the mend. And I also hope that Chuck continues to update the tumblr, no matter what her reasons were for leaving.

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    1. Thanks Heather! I won't update it any longer as I'll be too much out of the loop, but if anyone feels like doing it, I wouldn't mind giving them the password.

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  4. Rat what is wrong with you? No slander to friendly wave me goodbye, no over-simplified tabloid rhetorics like "Chuck is so bitter that Moz didn't accept her BEAUTIFUL plastic rose last time, and now she's in denial about his involvement blah blah blah" to explain my departure? I'm now far more concerned about YOUR health than Morrissey's. He probably played Cemetry Gates because he's looking forward to the new tour so much, it is such a happy song.

    And as I love to waffle, here's a final paragraph: The only appropriate place to meet Morrissey is in a concert hall, with the gap between barrier and stage only being the physical manifestation of a gap that could never be crossed anyway. The Deluded Dozen aren't deluded for believing in Morrissey's involvement with MW, they're deluded for hoping that it might be possible to narrow that gap with a Twitter DM. That said, it makes far more sense to live forever by the pool. And not a shabby leaking one like yours, Ratface. A nice pool, with adorable bath attendants. I may have lost my heart to one. I won't let you know if it worked out. Ciao!

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    1. Ah, you've fallen in love! Now your severance makes sense. Good luck with that. See you in the future, when all's black. And you are wrong about not being able to narrow the gap, but I do understand that gap narrowing is not for everyone.
      Enjoy your pool whilst the water remains warm, Chuck.

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    2. Ps Before you go forever, can you please advise me what to do regarding your friend Jenni, who seems to have taken up residence in the comments section of Day 1879?

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  5. Bon voyage! Enjoy Bergen, just watch out for the trams.

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  8. Sorry for deletions etc... My brain is all out of sorts from ticket ordering and pre sale and I wanted to combine into one post.

    The 'article,' if you could call it that, which seemed to merely conveniently extract quotes out of context from the original interview for Freeman's own nonexistent agenda, was basically 300 words of sensationalism stitched together with eye-rolling cliches, including "amirite," (shudder). Nauseating. It perplexes me that people are actually paid to unleash such material for publication.
    She also seemed to avoid answering my tweet to her informing her that being critical of Halal slaughter in NO way makes someone racist.
    I feel sorry that every time Moz stands up for animal rights someone jumps on him for it. Usually these same people ultimately don't care about human rights either and are just itching for argument, or to criticize him in order to attract attention towards their own very sorry existences.
    Enjoy Bergen. I look forward to seeing reviews, setlists, photos, etc.

    And if Moz sings Art Hounds my heart will take grand leaps of joy!

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  9. I can only guess at how tiresome it must be to be beaten with the same old worn down stick. The comments trying to attack Morrissey are unsubstantiated & very weak to say the least.
    Its so easy to hate & to incite hatred.

    On a brighter note I hope you have a grand time in Norway Rats.

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  10. You're so lucky Ratty dear and I'm happy for you! Ciao.

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  11. You're so lucky Ratty dear and I'm happy for you! Ciao.

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