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Saturday, 6 January 2018

Day 2382 - Stupidity, Despair, Giros, Teresas, Fence-Sitters and Legal dreams

*THIS ENTRY WAS POSTED ON DECEMBER 14TH 2017, BUT WHEN I MADE A SLIGHT EDIT ON JANUARY 6TH 2018, THE POSTING DATE WAS RESET TO THAT DATE. BLOGGER IS SHIT!*

Morrissey (as @TrueMorfessa) made a brief appearance on Twitter yesterday, tweeting:

"Stupidity sells and intelligence repels."

The tweet was obviously aimed at the recent hysterical headlines, and is a tweet that our Mozzer has posted on various other occasions. FTM records show me that he tweeted the same thing to Justin Bieber on Sunday June 24th 2012, whilst on Wednesday May 14th 2014 he tweeted, "Stupidity sells and intelligence repels. Except in Morrissey's World."

Morrissey's only other tweet was in response to Heather, who had pointed out that the "stupidity sells" tweet was even more true now than when first tweeted. Morrissey replied, "I despair."
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Although Morrissey's visit to the public bar of The Wrong Arms was brief, I did spend a few hours, on and off, chatting with him via Twitter's DM - or The Wrong Arms toilets as I prefer to call DM.
I won't give a report of all we talked about, as much of it was idle chit chat, but here are some highlights:

MOZ: Jon the Con is NOT a pessoa. This needs correcting. The band wearing turquoise is a fabrication.

ME: Oh, ffs! I've spent ages looking for those f***ing turquoise shirts! If Jon isn't a pessoa, then he is definitely from within your 'camp'.

MOZ: They most certainly are not! Jon the Con is absolutely not my creation. You only need to ask. I'm always forthcoming with the answers.

I have to say, I burst out laughing when I read that last sentence. "Always forthcoming with the answers"? Yeah, right!
Image result for MORRISSEY OPEN

I can't believe that I spent so long looking for an old MorrisseysWorld article that referenced the Morrissey band wearing turquoise suits, when there never was one. That rotten old Jon the Con has a lot to answer for....whoever he is!

Here are some more highlights, beginning with Moz making reference to the Der Spiegel dispute:

MOZ: I have written another statement of retaliation - it's a page full of expletives.

ME: Bollocks! Cunty bollocks. Wanky cunty bollocks!

MOZ: I feel like being generous. Give me accounts and aliases you wish to uncover. Ask and I will reveal.

ME: Dawn.

MOZ: Shared.

ME: Astra.

MOZ: I believe Nicole. Do you remember them?

ME: I remember Nicole. Whatever happened to her? And Willow? And I don't believe you. Astra is you. Why am I asking, you just pluck names at random. They're all you, you, you.

MOZ: They are not all my creations. I assure you.

ME: What about Broken?

MOZ: I can't deny Broken.

ME: I love Broken.

Image result for bleached hair gay


MOZ: I notice you've not asked who Dawn was a joint effort alongside. Are you not intrigued?

ME: I didn't expect an answer. Go on then...

MOZ: I'm bored of this already.

(This made me laugh)

ME: I'm off to the post office now. Do you want anything bringing in?

MOZ: Is this a new career move? Postmaster General.

ME: I'm flattered that you hold me in such high regard. I would have thought you'd suggest I apply for the position of stamp licker...

MOZ: Giro day? Surely no one works on the Isle of Wight? 

3. TERESA, TERESA

On Tuesday I published a list of all 286 of Morrissey's songs. Whilst compelling the list, I came across a few titles that I had never heard of before, including one called Teresa, Teresa. It is highly unlikely to be a song about the current UK Prime Minister as: A) It was recorded in 2007, and B) Theresa May has an 'h' in her name.
The reason I am mentioning this song is because Morrissey obviously prefers the name Teresa without an 'h', which coincidentally, so does the 'fake' Morrissey who interacts with our merry little group on Twitter. Back in March; with Westminster in a state of lockdown, 'Fake Moz' (as @AlfsButton) tweeted, "As long as Teresa May is safe and the royal family remain secure then that is all that matters. People of England, you do not matter." 
It's only a little coincidence, but I shall add it to the list. I added the song onto the list of ones that I would like to hear live, but as it's never actually been heard by anyone, anywhere, so I shan't hold my breath.
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4. THE MORRISSEY GANG

Yesterday I wrote that the audio of Morrissey's interview with Der Spiegel had been released, and following the release, surprise surprise, all the ex-Morrissey fans once again took to social media and Morrissey-Solow to stick another knife into old Mozzer. We are now at the point where every time Morrissey says anything about anything, these ex-fans come out to shout how they hate him even more than they did the last time he said something. But not only have we got these simpletons who have been bought by the headlines of the media, we also have the fans who just can't make up their mind if they want to stay a fan or not - the fence-sitters.

Yesterday a number of these fence-sitters took to Twitter to say how they needed to hear the audio so they could decide if Morrissey really did say what Der Spiegel printed...even though Morrissey has never denied saying what he said. When it transpired that he did say what everyone already knew he had said, the fence-sitters then started to tweeting things like, "it is testing to remain a fan" and, "I wish he wouldn't open his mouth." These lily-livered morons are just as bad as the simpletons.I decided to take a few of the fence-sitters to task, and tweeted, "After 35 years, you surely must have decided whether: A) Morrissey is a balanced individual who you will stick by whatever is said or B) He isn't and you won't.

A tweeter called, Steven Tallach (@steventallach - it does exactly what it says on the tin) replied to me by saying, "Why do you have to be in or out? We're talking about music appreciation here. Nobody's obliged to support Morrissey today just cos they did yesterday." I responded thus:

"No, it's more than just music appreciation with Morrissey. Everyone knows Morrissey fans are different. We're like a gang. And when in a gang, you either roll together or get out."
I added, "I'm actually enjoying this pruning of the tree."

Image result for morrissey gang

I'm not holding my breath that anything will change. If tomorrow Morrissey states, "Britain is always wet", the media will print the headline, "Bigmouth strikes again - Morrissey blames climate change on immigration", at which point the simpleton ex-fans will again scream, "I can't believe the man who helped me through my teens is such a nazi. This latest outburst proves it more than ever.... I always had my worries after Bengali in Platforms and The National Front Disco, and let's NEVER forget that he called the Chinese a sub-species and likened mass murder to KFC. I am so glad that Morrissey is no longer part of my life"......although of course, he very much IS, whilst the fence-sitters will ask the opinion of all their muesli eating mates on Twitter, before then stating exactly the same thing as last time, i.e. , "I gets harder and harder to defend Morrissey, I do wish he'd just sing his songs, and not say anything." Arghhh!
Image result for morrissey fans moz army


AND FINALLY

And finally, my eye was caught by this quote posted on Twitter yesterday by a tweeter called Caitlin (@a_m0nster) - it comes from List of the Lost:

"...and the flashy Maserati swirled from kerbside and home to the cosy ecstasy of Issac's inner climate, where all of his dreams were perfectly legal..."

What is it with legal dreams?

*Goes off singing* Spent the day in bed, it's a consolation when all my dreams, are perfectly legal

13 comments:

  1. Arghhh indeed. It seems to me that if you only want to listen to Morrissey's music and wish he wouldn't speak, you're missing the point entirely, and therefore should be listening to someone else's music who doesn't dare to have an opinion.

    As for naughty Jon, I'm not surprised that he was pulling our leg. I had no recollection of turquoise being mentioned but I do vaguely remember a possible mention of the band wearing something pink, and it may have been in a piece that mentioned facial tattoos - or this could all quite possibly be a figment of my imagination.

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  2. Entertaining piece of light relief with the banter between you & M Rats. I enjoy how you bounce off each other. I hope you both don't mind me saying, but I find it curiously endearing.

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  3. Dawn sounds like a gentle soul, maybe a Damon type, you do know old mozzer will secretly be laughing at all this nonsense in the press now that he has got over the shock of having to cancel the remaining shows is the one in Lecce really on.. also looking forward to my usual Christmas piss up in Altrincham, note to oneself remind me not to lose my coat this year

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  4. better clear that Lecce comment up, it was a bit of leg teasing with our Romina it said Lecce it really meant to say Leeds

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  5. speaking of broken, anyone remember that marriage proposal, maybe I should have called his bluff, but seriously I do miss his rants.. boy could he go on one and beware anyone on the receiving end

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  6. Why is there a picture of Theresa May with a blood clot in her eye, on this site? As though WITHOUT a blood clot, we wouldn't feel even NEARLY, punished even nearly ENOUGH?

    It ALMOST makes me nostalgic for the Cameron days. Almost, but no cigar! My very best best BEST poker face!! Vous comprenez??

    Tabloid photos of SamCam in the papers, with whatsisfacewas. Both of them, with their hands in the AY-ER, photographed in THE slummiest drug den club of alllll of the last 40 years, of anywhere, in all of the Balearics - and that's saying something to begin with! I think it was about a week after she gave birth. One of the times, at least. I don't pay attention to other people's ... domesticities.

    So, maybe a week after she gave birth. Maybe not. Maybe two. Who knows. Who CARES.

    Sometimes my memory deceives me. And it's sometimes, it's only other people who do.

    Morrissey is the best thing that ever was, that you will ever have, that will ever be, that will ever go, that will ever bite, who will ever fight, dream, lick, or scald you.

    Count your blessings now. People always should.

    I'm Not Morrissey. Shall we do it all over again, yet? And now in French? I should practice. I'm moving to the Cote d'Azur. February. Hold me to it. HOLD ME CLOSE.

    CALL ME ASTRA. CALL ME, NEVER.

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    Replies
    1. dearest Astra, so nice to hear from you in what can only be called a rant, as I am a little cheeky may I ask have you opened a bottle of Baileys early this festive season.. now remember before you reply.. season of goodwill etc. etc.

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  7. Hello lovely Star Maiden. I hope all is paradigmatic in your journey through the planes. Are you Not Morrissey or NotMorrissey or both or neither? I always thought NotMorrissey was very witty with a ditty.

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  8. Morr-ee-say hasn't been among us since 2014. It's amazing you cant see the difference between the genius of MW , the Broken review of YOR etc. And the crappy twitter fakes around now!

    Jon

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  9. Very interesting debate going on-even if I do not understand much of it. I do have to point out that although turquoise may have never been mentioned in MW,it has now been written about several times in FTM and a few years from may be the main topic with confusion over why there was so much interest over it. As for Morrissey, he is allowed his opinion, but that does not mean solow or the media should be allowed to interpret it falsely. Personally, I feel your Theresa May is a saint, compared to who we have currently as president in the states. Although, the media does not have to twist his words, as they are idiotic, dumb,mean and usually lies. On that final thought I think I will sign off. One of my favorite old movies, 'Singing In The Rain' is about to come on and I can use it to escape from reality for awhile. Hope you all have a good weekend and holiday season.

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  10. Nice spot on perfectly legal dreams.

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