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Tuesday, 12 June 2018

Tuesday June 12 2018 - A twelve minute wonder from the new Fletcher Lynd (The real and proper Day 2463)

Following the publication of my blog entry on Thursday evening, Morrissey (as @Alfsbutton) took to Twitter and sent me the following, very touching, tweet: "I must commend you on today's blog. Utterly mesmerizing."

My chest swelled with pride at this praise from the very highest level, and I tweeted to tell Our Mozzer that I was touched, and that the blog entry had taken me all day to write.

My swollen chest was quickly deflated though, when Our Mozzer's contradictory side-kick, Ricky Dan (@nothappysad75) appeared in the Wrong Arms and tweeted, "All day? Christ, I'd have said twelve minutes tops to throw that nonsense together." - he is obviously still smarting at me suggesting that he didn't spend much time putting that Humanity thing of his together. It's just jealousy of course - Ricky may have earned millions of pounds over the past seven years writing films and things whilst I have earned nothing whatsoever writing FTM, but he and I both know that in a hundred years from now, the world will still be talking about the cutting edge underground piece, Following The Mozziah, whilst absolutely NO ONE ANYWHERE will be talking of Special Correspondents.....come to think of it, no one anywhere is talking about Special Correspondents now!

Image result for ricky gervais special correspondents

Our Mozzer replied to Ricky Dan by tweeting, "I was being ironic. Is irony banned in 2018?", but when I then responded with, "thanks a bunch", Mozzer swayed back my way, tweeting, "Just kidding, I was very impressed. There was a favourite personal portrait of mine thrown in for good measure."

Image result for morrissey funny

Also following the publication of Thursday's FTM, I received a Twitter DM from Our Mozzer which read, "If less than 20 comments on today's FTM I will close Alf." I shared this message with my 97 Twitter followers, and thankfully seventeen of us combined to leave enough comments to keep our favourite diva in situ.

In the very early hours of Friday morning - 1:49am to be exact - Our Mozzer posted, "Found Found Found", and as if by magic, up popped the mysterious Garrett (@MRLennon__40) who replied, "I really believe the more you give your trust and love the more you're bound to loose (sic)", to which M then wittingly came back with, "Foot loose and fan free?". I wonder if OM and Garrett had been out late, or if they were up early, and were they together? Hmm.
Image result for morrissey sat empty stadium

OM's next visit to The Wrong Arms came exactly twelve hours later, when he replied to my tweet of, "Morrissey is Jonathan Livingston". He asked, "Are you Fletcher Lynd?" I'd like to think so.
Image result for two seagulls lighthouse

Morrissey's only other tweet of Friday was in response to newcomer,  Wolf (@UZ_1966) tweeting, "I've heard the tongue now must be centred at all time", to which M rhetorically asked, "Or is that censored at all times?"

This blog entry will get no praise whatsoever, and was thrown together in twelve minutes. They can't all be Pulitzer prize winning candidates.


  1. Wouldn't it be great news if M 'found, found, found' someone worthy in this murkiness. I need to hear stories of love because all I hear are cries of despair.

  2. oops have i stumbled on to a new blog, people being all nice and lovey dovey to each other .. enough to make my hair curl so it is, by the way colonel, something tells me that you wouldn't have closed down for good as there is always something going on in M's world

    1. I'm too sappy for my own good. I agree with you. He wouldn't have closed the blog or Twitter, not with the tour just around the corner.

    2. ssshhh!!! speak quietly, colonel whiskers has form in the stamping of feet department

  3. It was great to see everyone rally together to keep Alf around, especially the newcomers and those who don't comment very often. Hope to continue to see comments from all of you, and thanks to Alf for staying with us.

  4. Could the reason for those 2am tweets be anything to do with the fact that Morrissey has been spotted in Soho House? #LateNightDrinking

    1. oh colonel, are you saying poor old Moz is a lush.. well I would NEVER, EVER have guessed that


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